I push away from the table. “I need some air,” I tell them and walk out of the house and straight to the barn. Walking through the grass, I spot a couple of the boys who smile at me and hold up their cowboy hats to say hello. I walk into the stalls and see Ricardo, who has been with my family since my father took over the farm. “There she is,” he says, coming to me. He’s in his usual uniform of Levi’s, a button-down checkered shirt, and cowboy boots. He opens his arms for me, and I hug him. “Was wondering when you’d come back.”

“Well, here I am.” I step out of his hug and look around. “I’m going to take my girl out.”

“She’s already saddled for you.” I smile at him as he walks over to her stall and brings her out for me.

“Hey, my girl,” I say softly to her and nuzzle her neck. Climbing on the saddle, I say, “I’ll put her away when I get back.”

I gallop out into the field, and when I’m in the clearing, I push her fast. I feel the wind on my face as my hair whips back. I don’t even steer her; I just let her be free. It’s only when she slows down do I see she is taking me right back to where I was last night. I get off her and lead her to the water. I’m not here for more than a minute before I hear the sounds of twigs snapping, and I straighten my back up and my heart speeds up just a bit. Maybe coming all this way without anyone was a stupid idea.

I wonder if Casey has it wired all the way out here. I look around to see where I could escape. My hands get clammy, and I turn to jump back on the horse when I see him walking out of the woods. As I watch him walking with his head down, I take him in. His shoulders are wider, his arms much bigger, and I see a little bit of ink coming up out of his collar. I wonder when he got that, and I wonder why he got it. I shake my head and look around to see if I can get away without him seeing me, but then he looks up and sees me, and he stops in his tracks.

“What are you doing here?” he asks, and I look around.

“Are you asking me what I’m doing here, on my property?” I want him to take off his hat to see if his hair is still black and long on top. I wonder if it still feels silky. I remember when he didn’t cut it for a year because I loved to play with it. He shakes his head. “What are you doing here is the question.”