She stayed in the corner of the room, and as he passed her, she didn’t move a muscle. When he was in the hallway he heard her sobs. He wanted to run to her and make everything all right. He wanted to wrap his arms around her and save her, like he’d always saved her, but this time he’d be saving her from himself, and even Fred Brennan couldn’t do that.

11 p.m. to midnight, 1 January 1995

Jeremy

It was still raining but not as heavily. The clouds were dissipating and it was dark, except for the moon, whose light was mostly concealed by trees. Jeremy felt as if he was following Rave into the mouth of a monster. He stalled. The wind was like cold breath sending shivers down his back. The leaves, heavy with rain, splattered his face and neck, as Rave beat back clawing branches to form a path through unfamiliar dangerous ground. When he didn’t feel Jeremy close he turned to find him. ‘Come on.’

‘Where the hell are we going, Rave?’ Jeremy shouted.

‘It’s cool. Come on.’

Rave continued to ascend. Jeremy caught up and followed as closely as he could, hunkering low behind his friend. This is madness. I shouldn’t be here. I hate this place – it freaks me out. It’s always freaked me out. He knows that!

As they moved forward the night sky became more obscured by denser woods. I can’t see me feet! He could feel the undergrowth pulling and tugging at him, trying to trip him up. Every step became harder, the incline steeper. This is not gonna end well. I just want my bed. Then, all of a sudden, the ground flattened out and Rave was running through tall trees, past dense, prickly bushes. ‘Come on,’ he shouted, and Jeremy ran to keep up, afraid that if he didn’t he would truly be lost in the woods.

‘Rave!’ He couldn’t see him. ‘Rave!’ He could feel his pulse beat in his neck. That’s not good.

When he finally made it into the clearing, Rave was standing there, head back, arms raised, like Sly Stallone in Rocky. They were on a tiny stamp of rock but the white moon hung directly over it, as if it was shining just for them. It was blinding at first, but when his eyes became accustomed to the brightness, he moved forward and reached out his hand. ‘That’s mad,’ he said. ‘It’s like I can almost touch it.’

‘Cool, isn’t it?’ Rave said, and walked to what appeared to be an edge. ‘And over there.’ He pointed. Jeremy was feeling a little lightheaded so he stayed rooted to the spot, but when he followed Rave’s eye-line he could see city lights for miles.

‘Welcome to my Dublin.’ Rave laughed.

‘Wow. How did you know about this?’

‘I’ve been coming up here for months.’

‘On your own? Why?’