Sedona ate the pancakes, but as soon as we pulled into the parking lot of Lake Starlight High School, where they’re seniors, her appreciation for me ended. “Park in the back, I don’t want to be seen stepping out of this monstrosity.”

I’ve learned that there’s no pleasing a teenager, especially a female one—no offense, ladies, but her comment still irks me. How is my Jeep embarrassing? It has a snorkel so when I off-road, I don’t have to spend my money on a new engine and can instead afford to buy her whatever new outfit she wants. She should be grateful, thanking me. But she’s seventeen. Pleasing her is impossible.

I purposely park in the first row and honk my horn to announce our arrival, because pissing off Sedona is one of my top five favorite things to do. I’ll miss that come next year.

Phoenix’s stomach rumbles as she exits the car. Sedona has already raced off to the nearest entrance as if that creepy IT clown is following her.

I stroll toward the door, reloading my emails on my phone, hoping I received the response I’ve been waiting for and that it contains good news. Elijah, my star pitcher, cuts me off.

“Coach, I need some advice.” He runs his fingers through his long hair.

“How to cut your hair? Come see me. I’ve got clippers in my office.”

It’s like a contest these days for the kids to see who can grow their hair and look the most unkempt. I don’t get the appeal, and Elijah is the worst of them all.

“No, Coach, Becca broke up with me.” There’s a hitch in his voice. His eyes scour the courtyard, where most of the kids hang out until the first bell rings.

I stuff my phone into the pocket of my jacket. “Why?”

“Well…” He runs his fingers through his hair again.

For the love of God. Next season if I’m still here, I’m making a new rule—if your hair covers your eyes, I’m your barber.

Of course, then JP’s mom will call to complain. She always calls. I think if we changed the flavor of the performance drink we give them from strawberry to lime, she’d call. You know the type. She probably still wipes his ass to make sure he did it right. And though I understand that the Andrews family has had its share of heartbreak, she was like that before and after.

I push JP’s mom out of my head because just the thought of dealing with her will give me a headache. “What’d you do?”

I open the door to the hallway. With it being Monday morning, my fellow teachers nod, gripping their coffee mugs like life vests.