I hope Petra remarries. When she asks you what you think, tell her I said this: I want my children to have a father in their lives. Not some absent legend of a father—a real one. So as long as she chooses somebody who’ll love them and tell them they’ve done ok, then do it. Be happy.

I hope you live to see colonies established and the human race thriving on other worlds. It’s a good dream.

I hope these crippled children I have with me find something interesting to do with their lives after I’m dead.

I hope Sister Carlotta and Poke are there to meet me when I die. Sister Carlotta can tell me I told you so. And I can tell them both how sorry I am that I couldn’t save their lives, after all the trouble they went to to save mine.

Enough. Time to switch on the gravity regulator and get this boat out to sea.

From: Graff%[email protected]
To: Bean@Whereverthehelliam
Re: You did enough

You did enough, Bean. You only had a little time, and you sacrificed so much of it to helping Peter and me and Mazer. All that time that could have belonged to Petra and you and your babies. You did enough. Peter can take it from here.

As for all that God business—I don’t think the real God has as bad a track record as you think. Sure, a lot of people have terrible lives, by some measure. But I can’t think of anybody who’s had it tougher than you. And look what you’ve become. You don’t want to give God the credit because you don’t think he exists. But if you’re going to blame him for all the crap, kid, you got to give him credit for what grows from that fertilized soil.

What you said about Petra getting a real father for your kids. I know you weren’t talking about yourself. But I have to say it, because it’s true, and you deserve to hear it.

Bean, I’m proud of you. I’m proud of myself because I actually got to know you. I remember sitting there after you figured out what was really going on in the war against the Buggers. What do I do with this kid? We can’t keep a secret from him.

What I decided was: I’ll trust him.

You lived up to my trust. You exceeded it. You’re a great soul. I looked up to you long before you got so tall.

You did ok.

The plebiscite was over in Russia and it joined the FPE. The Muslim League was broken up and the most belligerent nations had been subdued, for now. Armenia was safe.

Petra sent her army home on the same civilian trains that had brought them to Moscow.

It had taken a year.

During that time she missed her babies. But she couldn’t bear to see them. She refused to let them be brought to her. She refused to take even a brief leave to see them.