That was hard to argue with. Now that her mother was out of sight, and it was just her and Noelle in an empty, musty hall, her anger bled out, and she was tired. “Moms are complicated, you know?” Miriam leaned against the wall, and Noelle leaned next to her.

“Oh, I know so, so well.” Noelle smiled sadly.

Miriam wanted to know what was behind that smile, but she was sure Noelle didn’t want to tell her. “I still talk to her generally because it’s easier than dealing with the drama she would kick up if I tried to cut her off. Today, specifically, she ambushed me. I don’t know. She’s a victim of my dad’s abuse too, even if she could have left more easily than I could. She was the only person who was in our home with me who might ever be able to understand how bad it was, if she would ever admit she was being abused. It’s…”

“Complicated,” Noelle finished for her.

Miriam nodded.

“She seems to be trying to repair things, in her own unskilled way,” Noelle observed.

“She would like people to believe that, certainly,” Miriam snorted. “She and I both know she just let yet another Yom Kippur go by without making any attempts at restitution. It’s all for show.”

“If you grew up with that kind of mom, it might be hard to trust your own instincts,” Noelle said quietly.

That was exactly it. It was so hard to trust her instincts when all the adults in her family, except Cass, had told her that what she was feeling and experiencing wasn’t real.

She felt way too exposed by Noelle’s insight. Her brain yelled “Danger! Retreat!”

“I’m sorry,” Miriam said. Dumping her family’s bullshit on Noelle was unfair and wouldn’t get her anywhere. It’s not like Noelle cared. “I shouldn’t shout in the hallways.”

Noelle propped one booted foot behind her on the faded wallpaper. “You know, you don’t have to forgive her for all that, even if she was abused, too.”

Suddenly angry again, Miriam pushed off the wall, balling her fists hard enough to dig her nails into her palms. How condescending for Noelle to act like Miriam couldn’t handle her mom on her own or had never considered cutting her off. “Thanks for your unasked for input, strange woman who hates me! I’ll file it right next to my mom’s unwanted advice,” Miriam replied.

“Whatever,” Noelle said behind her, as she walked away.