“Call me if the apocalypse is coming for Carrigan’s, again,” Elijah said, bussing their cheeks goodbye. Hannah shuttled him out the door, with a gift bag of cookies and a promise not to interrupt his holiday with their business any further, at least until New Year’s Eve.

Miriam looked across the almost empty kitchen at Noelle, furious and hopeful, grateful and sad all at once. More than anything, however, she felt ready. Ready to be done living a life defined by her fear.

She’d spent the last ten years in an emotional stasis. Now that she was back at Carrigan’s, facing down her father, and surrounded by the art of her deepest heart, she was ready to fight instead of fly.

Freaking out at Noelle, getting ready to leave…this was why Tara and Cole had never told her about the trauma that had changed the course of their lives. Why Hannah and Blue had a desperate love story they’d kept a secret from her. No one in her life trusted her to support them when emotions got hard, and she was done.

She was ready to be planted.

“Thank you,” Miriam said to Noelle. “No one’s ever done anything like this for me.”

Noelle stared back, no light behind her dark brown eyes. “I’m not doing this for you, or us. I’m doing this for Carrigan’s. There is no us.”

Chapter 21

Chapter 21

Noelle

What are you talking about?” Miriam protested. “I’m staying, I’m fighting. Like you wanted. I gave up everything in my life, to be here with you.”

Noelle stood up, rocking back on her heels and crossing her arms, trying to get some protection from Miriam and those big, sad eyes. She needed to make it clear, to Miriam and to her own heart, that they weren’t going to be together. She needed to draw the line painfully enough that they would both walk away.

“All I asked of you was to not run, Miri. You couldn’t even do that. You asked for a chance, I gave it to you, you ran. It’s over. You can stay for Hannah, or the Matthewses, or Cass’s memory, but don’t stay for me.”

“I’m staying because this is what I want for my life,” Miriam cried. “I’m in love with you!”

“If you loved me, why didn’t you trust me to fix it? Why, when the shit hit the fan, was your first impulse you and not us? That’s not love, and I can’t live waiting for the next time it happens. I can’t do this, Miri. I mean it, I physically can’t. I’m hanging by the tiniest thread. I can’t live waiting to lose you.”