Back Red Pottage Save as PDF
Contents ( 120)
  1. RED POTTAGE
  2. * * *
  3. MARY CHOLMONDELEY
  4. *
  5. Contents
  6. *
  7. *
  8. Chapter I
  9. *
  10. Chapter II
  11. *
  12. Chapter III
  13. *
  14. Chapter IV
  15. *
  16. Chapter V
  17. *
  18. Chapter VI
  19. *
  20. Chapter VII
  21. *
  22. Chapter VIII
  23. *
  24. Chapter IX
  25. *
  26. Chapter X
  27. *
  28. Chapter XI
  29. *
  30. Chapter XII
  31. *
  32. Chapter XIII
  33. *
  34. Chapter XIV
  35. *
  36. Chapter XV
  37. *
  38. Chapter XVI
  39. *
  40. Chapter XVII
  41. *
  42. Chapter XVIII
  43. *
  44. Chapter XIX
  45. *
  46. Chapter XX
  47. *
  48. Chapter XXI
  49. *
  50. Chapter XXII
  51. *
  52. Chapter XXIII
  53. *
  54. Chapter XXIV
  55. *
  56. Chapter XXV
  57. *
  58. Chapter XXVI
  59. *
  60. Chapter XXVII
  61. *
  62. Chapter XXVIII
  63. *
  64. Chapter XXIX
  65. *
  66. Chapter XXX
  67. *
  68. Chapter XXXI
  69. *
  70. Chapter XXXII
  71. *
  72. Chapter XXXIII
  73. *
  74. Chapter XXXIV
  75. *
  76. Chapter XXXV
  77. *
  78. Chapter XXXVI
  79. *
  80. Chapter XXXVII
  81. *
  82. Chapter XXXVIII
  83. *
  84. Chapter XXXIX
  85. *
  86. Chapter XL
  87. *
  88. Chapter XLI
  89. *
  90. Chapter XLII
  91. *
  92. Chapter XLIII
  93. *
  94. Chapter XLIV
  95. *
  96. Chapter XLV
  97. *
  98. Chapter XLVI
  99. *
  100. Chapter XLVII
  101. *
  102. Chapter XLVIII
  103. *
  104. Chapter XLIX
  105. *
  106. Chapter L
  107. *
  108. Chapter LI
  109. *
  110. Chapter LII
  111. *
  112. Chapter LIII
  113. *
  114. Conclusion
  115. *
  116. Postscript
  117. *
  118. * * *
  119. Endnotes
  120. *

The moment Rachel had said, "He is on the point of bringing out a book," her heart stood still. How could she have said such a thing? But apparently Hester took no notice.

"He must have been experimenting on my poor hand," she said. "I'm sure I never burned it like this myself."

"It will soon be better now."

"Oh! I don't mind about it now that it doesn't hurt all the time."

"And your head does not ache to-day, does it?"

"Nothing to matter. But I feel as if I had fallen on it from the top of the cathedral. Dr. Brown says that is nonsense, but I think so all the same. When you believe a thing, and you're told it's nonsense, and you still believe it, that is an hallucination, isn't it?"

"Yes."

"I have had a great many," said Hester, slowly. "I suppose I have been more ill than I knew. I thought I saw, I really did see, the spirits of the frost and the snow looking in at the window. And I talked to them a long time, and asked them what quarrel they had with me, their sister, that since I was a child they had always been going about to kill me. Aunt Susan always seemed to think they were enemies who gave me bronchitis. And I told them how I loved them and all their works. And they breathed on the pane and wrote beautiful things in frost-work, and I read them all. Now, Rachel, is that an hallucination about the frost-work, because it seems to me still, now that I am better, though I can't explain it, that I do see the meaning of it at last, and that I shall never be afraid of them again."

Rachel did not answer.

She had long since realized that Hester, when in her normal condition, saw things which she herself did not see. She had long since realized that Hester always accepted as final the limit of vision of the person she was with, but that that limit changed with every person she met. Rachel had seen her adjust it to persons more short-sighted than herself, with secret self-satisfaction, and then with sudden bewilderment had heard Hester accept as a commonplace from some one else what appeared to Rachel fantastic in the extreme. If Rachel had considered her own mind as the measure of the normal of all other minds, she could not have escaped the conclusion that Hester was a victim of manifold delusions. But, fortunately for herself, she saw that most ladders possessed more than the one rung on which she was standing.

"That is quite different, isn't it," said Hester, "from thinking Dr. Brown is a gray wolf?"

"Quite different. That was an hallucination of fever. You see that for yourself now that you have no fever."

"I see that, of course, now that I have no fever," repeated Hester, her eyes widening. "But one hallucination quite as foolish as that is always coming back, and I can't shake it off. The wolf was gone directly, but this is just the same now I am better, only it gets worse and worse. I have never spoken of it to any one, because I know it is so silly. But Rachel—I have no fever now—and yet—I know you'll laugh at me—I laugh at my own foolish self—and yet all the time I have a horrible feeling that"—Hester's eyes had in them a terror that was hardly human—"that my book is burned."