Shoban wanted more than anything else for Ashna to let that anger out, but she looked wiped. There were smudges of mascara under her eyes. Either she had cried, or she’d rubbed her eyes from sleep like she’d done as a little girl. Maybe this wasn’t the right time.

“Say it, Mom.”

“Of course I don’t want you to sell your livelihood. I want you to find a livelihood that gives you pleasure. You deserve that.”

“Not this again.”

“Do you truly have any love for cooking? Not for Curried Dreams, but for running a restaurant. Now you’re showing up in front of a camera every day and you’re this person you’ve been trying to be for twelve years in front of the whole wide world. Have you ever taken the time to ask what it takes from you? Being who you’re not takes too much energy, beta. Have you ever asked yourself why you’re doing a thing that gives you no joy? Your father is gone, there’s nothing to prove.”

Ashna picked up the glass and tapped it against the countertop, the controlled knocking of fragile glass on unbreakable stone a perfect foil to her anger. “Is there anything you don’t blame Baba for, Mom? How can you ask me to come work for your foundation while accusing him of ‘tying me up’ for doing the same thing? Aren’t you trying to tie me up in what you love too?”

And no one had stopped to consider what Ashna loved. She didn’t say it, but it was right there in her eyes.

Shobi was doing it now. She was asking Ashna what she loved and Ashna was deliberately skirting the question. “You don’t have to have anything to do with the foundation. Let’s talk about what you actually want to do with your life.”

This time Ashna’s laugh was louder, wilder. “I love this. Suddenly you have time for me. And suddenly I’m supposed to know how that works. Trust, love, being able to ask for things, having heart-to-hearts, these aren’t things you schedule into your calendar one fine day. How much time have you set aside, by the way? When does your real life need you back?” She squeezed her forehead. “Never mind. It doesn’t matter when you go back. You want to know why I don’t want your help? It’s because I don’t know how. I’ve never had it.”