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Contents ( 13)
  1. PRAISE FOR THE PLAYS OF NEIL LABUTE
  2. REASONS TO BE PRETTY
  3. IN A DARK DARK HOUSE
  4. WRECKS
  5. FAT PIG
  6. THE MERCY SEAT
  7. THE SHAPE OF THINGS
  8. BASH
  9. ALSO BY NEIL LABUTE
  10. Copyright
  11. Contents
  12. PREFACE
  13. REASONS TO BE HAPPY

GREG I’m in a real spot here, ok? Trying to sort out my life these days … and it’s been a blast being with you, I love it. You’re so beautiful and, and … fun …

GREG is searching for a word and CARLY waits. Finally:

CARLY But …

GREG But: I’ve been sending out resumes for, like, teaching jobs all over the place, in different states even, because that’s my dream, to have a full-time position in English and to … so I don’t know how that kind of thing sits with you … what with your mom here and, and … there’s Kent to consider …

CARLY rolls her eyes at this but GREG keeps talking.

GREG No, we have to because like it or not, he is a factor here, Jennifer is his daughter … and then, you know … this whole “Steph” thing happens! We just—and now she’s left Tim and I haven’t even … I do love her … I mean I say that or did, anyway, to her, “I love you” but … have I really thought that through? I don’t know! I felt like I did but then you tell me I’m gonna be a father … with you … and that makes me just … my heart gets all, like, so …. (Gesturing.) You know? Full.

CARLY … and …

GREG And I’m trying to explain! (Beat.) Look, I feel like I could love you … but it just seems bad to tell you right now, when I just said it a second ago … about Steph, I mean. But yeah … I think that’s what I’m saying. That’s my … you know … that’s what I’d like to do, is find a way to be with you. A path that leads me back to us and to this thing that we started. I know that’ll take some work but I’m up for that, I want to do it … to … venture off that way and forget the … you know … the past. My past with Steph, or … whatever … and be yours. (Beat.) So, yeah … (Beat.) There! I did it!

CARLY … did I … miss something?

GREG No! Didn’t you hear what I just said?

GREG looks at CARLY, waiting for some kind of response.

CARLY I mean, yeah … but it was, like, the Gettysburg Address.

GREG Come on! Jesus … that was the hardest thing I ever had to say before! Please don’t … like, make fun of me …

CARLY I’m not! I just … did you slip in there somewhere that you’d rather be with me?

GREG That’s what I … yes! That’s exactly what I was trying to say during the whole last part!

CARLY Ok. Good. But …/ … I’m …

GREG What?/ Was that the wrong answer?

CARLY No, no, I just … but is it what you want? “You?” I mean, is it really, Greg?

GREG It’s … I don’t know! Yes!/ Yes. Under the circumstances.