She squeezes my dick, I get hard. That’s biology, but it’s not a substitute for the healthy relationship we both deserve. We’re in our thirties, not college students looking for a quick hook-up. I’ve given in to physical urges for years, hoping it would restore what we once had.

Intimacy. Passion.

But it hasn’t and I’m no longer sure how to fix what is broken. Not between our bodies, but between our hearts.

She rolls away, the sheet snapping when she jerks it back with an angry flourish. Her feet hit the floor.

“I’m sorry,” she says, drawing a deep breath. “It’s just so frustrating. I don’t know why this is happening to us.”

I roll to sit up on my side of the bed and run weary hands through my hair. “We need to talk, Ko. Maybe it’s time to…”

I glance over my shoulder and see her seated on the edge of the bed, faced away from me, her naked back bowed, her dark head bent. “God, Ezra. We have a son. We’ve been together so long. You’re this quick to give up on us?”

“Quick?” My laugh emerges as scornful despite my best intentions. “We’ve been to couples’ counseling. We’ve done date nights. Tried sex in public to fix this. Every damn thing Dr. Cairns recommended, we tried, and things aren’t getting better.” My words fall on us, a shower of pebbles that hurt when they land on us both. “Things have gotten worse, Ko.”

“We haven’t tried everything,” Aiko says, her voice hesitant, hushed.

I stand, stretch and walk over to the window, pulling back the drapes to study Noah’s garden out back. The sprinkler isn’t on. I could have sworn I set the timer last night.

Aiko comes to stand in front of me, sandwiching her small body between my bare torso and the window. She’s donned one of her colorful kimonos. With her long straight hair, dark eyes and golden skin, she’s gorgeous. She’s also a brilliant photographer and a remarkable mother to my son. It’s easy to see why we began, but with our chemistry shriveled and dried and the arguments over nothing increasing—it’s hard to see us making it much further.

“Ezra, we haven’t tried everything Dr. Cairns suggested,” she says again.

“What haven’t we tried?” I ask, glancing over her head to inspect the tomatoes below, easy enough since barefoot she only reaches the middle of my chest.

“An open relationship.”

My eyes jerk from a row of peas to her determined expression with her wide, tight mouth, set jaw and pleading eyes. “We didn’t try it because it’s a bad idea. You actually think me fucking someone else is the answer?”

“Maybe me fucking someone else is.”