So maybe I can’t . . . I can’t do drugs. I did too many drugs, I hurt my face with drugs . . . I’ll call Julie, she was always nice. She was too nice, but she was nice. Maybe I could talk her into not telling anyone about this. I’m so embarrassed . . . What do I say? Help me, I’m a . . . Oh, Jesus, it’s hard. I don’t feel well, though. I’ve gotta . . . I’ll just disguise my voice and say I’m a friend of . . . No, no, I’ll just . . . Oh, fuck, I’ll just tell them to come and get me. This’ll be what it’s like if I don’t. I’ll be in rooms like this all my life, with drugs that go down the drain and yellow walls and hamburgers that move . . .

I’ve gotta go where somebody can take care of me. All right, just call. I can go back and they’ll take care of me and then I’ll be okay. Calm down, you’ll be okay . . . I’m so scared . . . Just call . . .

“Uh, yeah, is Julie Marsden there? Uh, hi, Lucille. It’s Alex. No, no, I’m all right. Could, um, could I talk to Julie? Oh. Well, do you have her number? It’s important. Yeah, it’s . . . Okay, thanks.”

Four-seven-six-two-nine-four-five. Four-seven-six-two-nine-four-five. Four-seven-six-two-nine-four-five. Okay. Okay . . .

“Hello, is this Julie? This is Alex. No, I’m okay . . . No, I’m . . . I’m in a hotel. I . . . God, could you? Could you come and get . . . Yeah, I hate to be a . . . Okay. Yeah, it’s the Ramada Inn in Burbank. Room 823. Okay, I’m here. Yeah. No, I’m here.”

Okay, just sit, just hold your knees tight. Okay, rock . . . Oh, God, oh my God . . . Okay, okay, she’s coming. Somebody’s coming. It’ll be okay . . . Just hold yourself, hold yourself . . . It’s gonna be okay . . . Somebody’s coming . . .

DAY TWENTY-SIX

Alex is back. The story is that he checked into a hotel in the valley with a pound of cocaine. He had done quite a bit of it when he thought he heard someone breaking into his room and he freaked out and spilled all the rest in a bathtub full of water. Something like that. Bart told me, and he tends to exaggerate a little. Anyway, then he got in the elevator to go get more coke (!?!) and there were these people who laughed at him and said something to him about Florida, so Alex freaked out and went back to his room and called Julie.