‘Yeah, really good, Mel,’ I said, shaking my head in wonder so I could get a look at the brunette on the other side of the room. She was speaking with someone, standing, maybe leaving.

Zac said, ‘The bit about the Martians and marshmallows was my favourite. I actually had snot coming out of my nose.’

Good on ya, Mel, I thought, looking for …

The brunette approached the microphone, raised it, tapped it. ‘Hello, everyone. My name’s Brienne Halliday, and I have what is guaranteed to be the shortest piece of the night, given it’s the shortest piece by far – my fault, deadlines – in this lovely zine.’ She was confident, killer body, a seasoned performer.

‘OK, bathroom break,’ Mel said. ‘Can I get you guys anything?’

‘Another beer,’ Zac said.

‘Nah,’ I said. ‘I’m good, Mel, thanks.’

Brienne said, ‘So I asked him again – how exactly do you want me to hold it?’

Laughter.

Zac leant closer. ‘Sarah told me you and Biddy are considering sleeping with other people.’

Fuck’s sake. We weren’t really. I’d told Sarah that we were, in a fruitless bid to make her jealous. ‘Um, kind of … It’s more that I want to. Biddy’s … Yeah, she’s not that bothered.’

He nodded. ‘I think “livid” was the word Sarah used.’

Fuck’s sake.

‘Relationship troubles?’ Josh said, leaning in.

‘Oh, it’s nothing,’ I said, eyes on Brienne. ‘Just a bit of tension with Biddy.’

‘You guys seem really happy together.’

‘We are,’ I said. ‘We actually are. Actually, um, I might just go to the bathroom too.’

I stood in line, waited until a cubicle was free, went in, leant against the door, texted Sarah: Hey! How’s Sophie? You know Zac tells me everything you two talk about? They’re too intimate, the things you’re telling him. Especially when you’re not discussing them with me first.

I returned, sat next to Mel, who was talking to Zac about his new apartment.

‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘The guy who owns the place, Marcus, is a little … particular. But otherwise, it’s great. You should come over and see it. Although Marcus has already warned me, no parties.’ He looked at me. ‘The main thing is I’ll be closer to you, Sarah and the kids. I can be on call, like, whenever.’

That was … good? Yep, that was good.

‘We’re all proper neighbours now,’ Mel said.

‘Let’s toast to that,’ Josh said, raising his glass.

I clinked my glass with his, Zac’s, Mel’s, sipped, looked at my phone – no reply from Sarah, nothing from Biddy. I was in the bad books.

Brienne was in my good books. ‘I’ll be at the Comic’s Lounge next week, Tuesday and Thursday. Earlybird tickets are, um, still available.’

Applause. She looked at … looked at … didn’t look in our direction.

‘And you’re sorted for furniture?’ Josh asked Zac.