‘Yes, I’m sure,’ he said. ‘I don’t doubt that for a second.’

‘I’ve been very angry and hurt and confused, and we want some answers.’

‘I understand.’

‘We’re not trying to punish you.’

He’d regained some of his composure. ‘I didn’t lie to you in any way that really matters. Being with your family is –’

‘You’ll never be with my family again,’ I said. ‘If I see you anywhere near my kids, I’ll –’

Sarah sighed, brushed her hair from her face. ‘Zac, I’m still open, down the line, to having you in our life, but –’

‘Chris just spoke on your behalf to say that can’t happen. And that’s fine, I can deal with that.’

Sarah sighed again, looked at me, at Zac. ‘It took me a long time to come around to accepting all of this, Zac. It was the same for Chris. Have you had a troubled conscience?’

‘Of course, Sarah. Of course.’

‘We were about to rent an apartment with you,’ she said. ‘I mean –’

‘Have you had any sexual thoughts, fantasies or urges involving my children or behaved inappropriately towards them?’

‘I can’t believe you’re even asking –’

‘That’s not an answer, Zac.’

‘What have I done, even with all the lies, to make you think –’

‘I’m not asking you for a question, I’m asking for a fucking yes or no.’

‘Chris …’ He took off his glasses, rubbed his face.

I sipped my beer, sat silent. Calm. I could wait. I’d wait.

Sarah leant forwards again. ‘Have you considered that you might need to get some help?’

‘Yes,’ he said. ‘I can see there’s a problem in my behaviour.’

‘That’s a relief,’ I said. ‘Did you touch my kids? Did you make them touch you?’

He looked at me, looked broken. ‘Chris, I love those kids. You know I love them. What you’re implying is the worst thing you could possibly say to me, even worse than what you’ve said about my mother or whatever. I would never lie about my mother dying and I would never jeopardise Sophie or Oliver. What you’re saying makes me feel physically sick.’

‘Because you abused them?’

Boom.

His fist on the table, a crash. ‘No, Chris. I would never do anything to harm those kids. They bring me joy, OK? Simple innocent joy.’

I sat back, temples pounding. He sounded genuine, looked genuine – a clear indication he was either telling the truth or lying through his teeth. I stared, kept staring, tried to read him. ‘OK, well, if there’s anything you want to add, now’s the time, but if not, I guess we’ll see you around.’

A moment’s silence, a slow nod. He lifted his bag.

‘If you resolve all of this and manage to sort yourself out, please get in touch with me,’ Sarah said.