‘Yeah.’ I broke eye contact, looked at the walls, scarlet and shadow. A spiderweb above the sliding wardrobe doors but no spider. My preference, if we were going to have sex, was to act with haste so we could get in a few solid hours before falling asleep and breaking the spell. We had to loosen up, fuck it …

Sarah stroked her thigh, flicked her hair. ‘You’ll never guess who I got a text from today.’

Jack the Dom? Zac?

‘I give up.’

‘Vernon.’ She smiled, and in that smile I could see she was happy, and in that happiness I could see she was … Fuck, I had to say something …

‘Oh yeah?’ I said. ‘So, what are you thinking?’

‘What do you mean?’

‘Why are you telling me?’

‘Just keeping you in the hula hoop.’

I wanted to know, didn’t. ‘Do you want to see him again?’

‘I don’t know.’ She stared at the bedspread. ‘There’s this other guy, Jack …’

… the Dom. ‘Oh? On Tinder?’

She nodded. My testosterone …

‘What’s he like?’

She licked wine from her lips, teeth. ‘I don’t actually know. Not really. I mean, we’d have to meet up to see if there’s a spark. Maybe a daytime date or something, somewhere safe.’

I’d cleaved to her through the night, told her I loved her, woken with a smile on my face.

‘That’ll be you soon,’ she said. ‘Scheduling meet-ups with your Tinder dates.’

‘Yeah, I know.’

‘And Biddy’s all right with that idea now?’

‘Yeah, I think so. She knows it’s inevitable, so, yeah …’

In truth, I hadn’t mentioned it for weeks and had no intention of doing so, but now that Sarah and I had slept together, the thought of me being with other women might finally – finally – make her want me more. In any case, there was nothing to worry about, no need to complicate matters with probing queries based on niggling doubts, so –

‘Hey, weird question. You definitely used condoms with Vernon, yeah?’ Of course she had, no point asking, but … Was she blushing? ‘I mean, you said you did, right?’

She looked at me, her little voice. ‘No.’

Might upset me.

‘Sorry … what?’

Her head down, eyes on the bed. ‘He didn’t want to, Chris.’

I took a breath, heartbeat. Stared at the kids’ dirty clothes on the darkened floor, tried not to pay too much heed to the stomach cramps, my shaking hands – breathe. ‘You don’t think safe sex is important?’

She looked up, away again. ‘Yeah, of course I do.’

Thank fuck, so … ‘What about Valentino?’

‘What about him?’

‘Did you have safe sex with him … You know, cos you said you did?’

Sarah’s eyes. ‘No. Look, there’s many a slip between cup and –’

‘Mick? Apart from at Valentino’s party when I was watching you, I mean.’

‘Chris …’ Eyes down. ‘No.’

‘Assi?’

Heartbeat. Might surprise me.

‘No.’