“I’m sorry.” She sniffs.

“Stop saying that.”

“But I am. You’re being so brave. And here I am making you comfort me when it should be the other way around.”

“You can’t help how you feel.”

“I feel like shit.”

I pat her back. “That’s good, let it all out.”

“It’s just not fair, you know?” she mumbles into my shoulder. “Why you?”

“No idea.”

“How am I supposed to spend the rest of my life without you?”

“Again, I have no idea. But you will. You’ll get through this and you’ll be OK. I promise.”

“But you don’t like making promises you can’t keep.”

“Exactly. This one is easy. You will be OK, Kate. In fact, you’ll be more than OK. You’ll have a wonderful life, an amazing life. You’ll be happy, and have a family, and do all the things you’ve ever wanted to do. You know how I know?”

She sniffs and shakes her head, still buried in my shoulder.

“I hope you’re not wiping snot on me.”

That makes her laugh. A kind of gulp laugh, and she sits back up and looks at me, her face puffy and tear-stained.

“I know you’ll be fine, Kate, because of this.” I cross my hands on my chest and give her a sad smile. “Because of me. If you ever get stuck in a rut, or in a situation that makes you unhappy, promise me that you’ll think about me. And you’ll remind yourself that some of us didn’t get to make choices, but you will, and you must. If something isn’t working in your life, change it. I know it sounds too simple, and words are easy to say. But you have to promise me, Kate. Live your best life. For me.”

She swallows hard and nods.

“Say it.”

“I promise.”

“You’ll live your best life.”

“I will.”

“Good.” I lean back, satisfied. “Because if you don’t, I’ll come back and haunt your arse.”

She snorts with laughter. “Yeah, that sounds like something you’d do.”

“You better believe it.”

She reaches over and picks up my hand, smiling sideways at me. “Thanks.”

“For what?”

“Talking me back off the ledge.”

“What are friends for.”

“I love you.”

“Mumble mumble mumble.” I cough into my hand.

She cups her ear. “Sorry? I didn’t catch that.”

“Oh, come on. You know I don’t go in for big declarations of affection.”

“I think you can make an exception just this once.”

“Is that the time?” I pretend to look at a watch I’m not wearing.

She pounces, pinning me down and tickling me gently in the ribs. “Say it.”

“Stop.” I giggle breathlessly. Kate used this method to coerce me into doing her will when we were small girls, and although it’s been quite some time since she employed it, unfortunately for me, its effectiveness hasn’t waned.

“I’m not stopping until you say it,” she insists.

“This is cruel,” I gasp.

She draws back, alarmed. “I’m not hurting you, am I?”