At the thought, the brick that’d been sitting in my stomach for weeks vanished.

Simultaneously, all the hairs on my body stood to attention in terror.

I knew the right thing to do. But that did not mean I relished the thought of doing it.

SIXTEEN

Self-Analysis:

Darcy Phillips

Is a good person who did a bad thing two very bad things.

Would do anything to protect Brooke, especially when Brooke gets rose-colored-glasses syndrome when she’s in love.

Is wondering if it’s okay to hurt someone to save them from worse hurt?

Isn’t that called “The Greater Good”?

Isn’t that the motivation behind every movie villain ever?

Is not a movie villain. Is not any type of villain. Right?

Is trying her goddamn best, okay?

(Are you sure about that?)

I waited until lunchtime the next day, when Brooke and I had settled in at our table. Brooke’s spirits seemed okay, at least, compared to the last few weeks. I only noticed her staring in the direction of Raina’s table once.

I’d been rehearsing this all morning. I knew exactly what I was going to say, and exactly what Brooke was going to say back, and how I would respond to that. I’d prepared for at least fifteen different possible Brooke reactions to my news. Nothing could take me by surprise, right? I just had to do it.

“So, as far as I know, Ray doesn’t have a date to prom,” Brooke said. She seemed pleased. “I don’t know if she asked anyone or anything, just that she’s going with a group of girls. Jaz told me. And I doubt that’ll change in the next three days.”

Just do it. I forced a smile. “That’s good.”

Brooke hesitated. “Did you know about Brougham?”

I snapped out of my pump-up mantra. “What about him?”

“He’s going to the prom with his ex-girlfriend.”

“Oh.” Brooke had been Team Brougham ever since I’d called her after the kiss, and had inexplicably remained so even after it went nowhere. “Yeah, he told me a while ago. I don’t think she’s an ‘ex’ anything anymore, either. It’s fine.”

“Wow. I’m really proud of you, Darc. I can only imagine how weird it must feel, but you’re totally being the bigger person here.”

Just do it, just do it, just do it.

“Why are you staring at me?” Brooke asked.

Just—“Because I did something really bad and I have to tell you and you’re going to hate me forever.”

Well, her expression was closer to wry amusement than fear or fury. For now, at least. This was a good start. “Um, okay, I doubt that, but shoot.”