‘It was around eleven at night, maybe a little later. I didn’t want to separate our fused skin. But I had to leave. I ran my tongue over her naked lips in a final kiss. I wanted to tell her there and then, “I’m ready,” to let her know all of my plans. There had been one other time in my life when I didn’t get around to saying “I love you.” In that instance, the woman left me before I could make up my mind to tell her. Despite this, I still wanted to wait the extra ten days this time. I pressed her hand lightly in lieu of a goodbye, but she gripped my hand and wouldn’t let go. She just looked at me, a faint smile on her lips. Then she said, “Everyone at home wants me to go back. They’re not angry with me any more. On the contrary, they’re worried. I’m leaving tomorrow. I’ve agreed to get married. That same man is waiting for me, the one who was the reason I left. I left home to come here and wait for your decision. Such a chain of waiting. He’s been waiting for me, I’ve been waiting for you. Let this chain break now. My wedding preparations will begin as soon as I return. There’s very little time. Earlier, I was afraid – I’d already given you all I had. What did I have left to offer, how could I start a life with someone else? But I’ve overcome that fear now – I can take all that I got from you away with me, and offer it to someone else. Everything you’ve taught me – to give and take with all that one has – and you’ve taught me so much physically, too, that I know I can make any man happy now. Whoever ends up as my companion will be satisfied, will always turn to me … unless … ”

‘“Unless …?” I asked.

‘“Unless you ever recognise me after today.”’

I hid my face in my hands.

‘She said, “Even if we do happen to meet, let there be no flash of recognition in your eyes. Let the portion of your heart in which I exist die this very moment. Let us free ourselves from this bond as far as is possible.”

‘I never tried to find out what happened after that. Only after several months had passed did I go back to the flat. That was when I had the wall painted over, in a deliberately deep shade. But you tell me that the image can be seen through the paint, that the figures come alive and make love in a frenzy. I cannot accept this as the truth. Because she has left forever, beyond a doubt she has left – like the dead, she cannot return your love or make someone love her …’

When I heard you say these last words, I wept. Weeping, I returned to this flat. After being chastised by sorrow in its real form, I yearned for you. I wanted to wipe your sorrowful face and draw it to my breast.