We waited on more social media blowups. For the two weeks following Taylor’s bombshell, the #BabyGettersToo movement went from three to five to seven baby daddies getting exposed. And there were ripples . . .

First, a decree from Terrier that anyone caught spreading “maternity-related gossip” would face “stiff penalties” (trigger more vomit emojis). Like, was the faculty spying on our social media? It didn’t slow down the ogling, but everyone felt some kind of way about the implication. School was supposed to be school, we got to be free when we were on our own. Right?

Second, Kiera. She’d stopped posting. Stopped talking, really. Mad people came at her like, “Did you know? When did you know? What do you know?” She handled it all like a champ with side-eye and no comments. Even in Purity Pledge she seemed less there, but I think Sister Vanessa knew what was up, and didn’t make a big deal about it. Jameer tried to keep me in the loop on how Kiera was doing with his spotty insight.

“She won’t talk about it,” he said. “Not even to me.”

I was thinking, isn’t it part of our agreement that you get her to talk about it so I can be better prepared for what’s next? Instead, he kept molding me to be the Purity Pledge champ with choice scriptures and observations that I parroted through the next few sessions at church.

Matthew 6:22 was about turning your eyes from worthless things—like hot cars, and IG models in bikinis. It was supposed to make you stronger to focus on worthwhile, pure things. I talked about that.

Exodus 20:14 flat-out said don’t commit adultery—which was pretty much any sex where you’re not married. I became the Exodus 20:14 spokesman.

There were other verses too that Jameer passed me on Post-it Notes that were stuck to my desk at home. From Genesis, and Romans, and 1 Thessalonians (which you said like “First Thessalonians” not “One Thessalonians” even though there was clearly a “1” there—weird, right?).

Sister Vanessa seemed “impressed by my spiritual growth”—her words—but I didn’t think anyone else was. As much as I wanted to, I got it was probably better that we didn’t press Kiera during these trying Baby-Getter times.

Even Qwan agreed. Sorta. One day on the way to school he asked, “None of those other church girls throwing you any vibes, man? I know you been All-Kiera-Everything forever, but there are no unattractive ladies in that Pledge. Got me ready to get some religion.”

“Would Angie be cool with that?”

Annnnd, he shut up. We’d yet to get into how much time he’d been spending with her. It was very un-Qwan-like. Two weekends passed without a single request to chauffeur him to some new girl’s house. I almost wanted to press my hand to his forehead and check his temperature the way Mom did when she thought I wasn’t feeling well.

Speaking of Mom . . .

Third ripple, even my parents and Cressie knew about #BabyGettersToo. Each asking me about it on separate occasions.