Haven is still in my lap, her weight pressing down in a way that is making it impossible to think, her fingers still tracing over my skin like she’s enjoying watching me completely come undone beneath her. I am, I’m so gone for her it’s pathetic. This is a moment I’ve thought about, dreamed about, replayed in my head over and over again for the past year, imagining what it would feel like to have her this close, to feel the heat of her body against mine, to hear her say my name like that, soft and teasing, like she already knows exactly how to ruin me.

I don’t know how the fuck to handle it. Her hands are everywhere, moving over my chest, pressing into my shoulders, testing, exploring, like she’s still figuring me out, like she’s trying to learn exactly how I react to her.

And, God, my body is betraying me in ways I can’t even pretend to control anymore. Pressure building so fast I feel like I can’t breathe, every single muscle in my body locked up as I try to keep my composure. But it’s not working. It’s so not fucking working. I shift under her, gritting my teeth, barely swallowing down a groan as I feel the way she settles against me, the way she presses down just a little more. Yeah. She definitely notices what’s happening to me right now.

I’m so hard it hurts. Every part of me is screaming for more. More weight, more friction, more of her. The fabric between us is the only thing saving either of us from seeing just how far gone I am.

Fuck. I should be embarrassed, maybe? I think? Fuck, I don’t know.

Haven moves again, shifts just enough to drag over me, and I realize with absolute, undeniable clarity I’m so fucking screwed. I drop my head back against the couch, sucking in a sharp breath, my hands clenching and unclenching where they rest against her waist, because I know if I touch her right now, I’m not going to be able to stop. I am so far past the point of being okay, so far past the point of rational thought, so far past the point of pretending that my body isn’t already reacting to every single move she’s making. And just when I think it cannot possibly get any worse…

A mocking bitter laugh rings from the other side of the room. Fucking kill me.

My entire body goes rigid, every muscle locking up as I squeeze my eyes shut, already knowing exactly who the hell that is before I even look.

No. No, no, no, not right now. I feel Haven stiffen against me, her body going tight, her breath catching, her fingers digging into my shoulders.