“Right now? Seth, did something happen?”

Yes. I ruined everything and it’s all my fault. Stop sounding so bloody sympathetic. Yell at me for being such a horrible son. Tell me to stay here, tell me I can’t come. Out loud, I only whispered,

“Please, Dad. I want to come home.”

“Of course you can come home,” he muttered. “I’ll call the school and let them know.”

I pressed my eyes shut, exhaling shakily into the silence of the room. Through the wal s, I could still hear the music from Jasper’s room, my heart rattling around in my rib cage at every beat. I wished it would stop. I wished the skeleton would come back and pluck it right out, for real this time.

“Thanks, Dad.”

“Of course,” he softly said. “I’ll pick you up at the station tomorrow, all right? We can talk about everything then.”

“Okay,” I said even though it wasn’t and hung up.

I got up and left the room in the same mechanical manner I had made the call, my legs carrying me to Evelyn’s room seemingly without my doing. Standing in front of her door, I also heard music, but it wasn’t dark or taunting, but some light and calming study sounds that immediately ceased when I knocked.

“Hey,” Evelyn said. The look on her face, somewhere between pity and confusion, told me she had already read the update on The Chitter Chatter. Tugging me inside, she said, “Here, sit down. Do you want something to drink? You look pale.”

“No thanks,” I rasped. Instead of sitting down on her bed like she gestured for me to do, I hovered by the door. Do it quick, like a Band-Aid. “I just came to tell you that I’m leaving.”

Evelyn froze. “What?”

“I talked to my dad. He offered to let me come home. I’m leaving tomorrow.”

“Wait . . . you called your dad?”

“Yeah.”

“But . . . but what about us?” Evelyn asked, an incredulous frown on her face. “What about Jasper? Are you really just going to leave like this?”

“Yeah. I think he’ll appreciate it.”

“Seth, you know that’s not true. I know you didn’t kiss Amelia.

You can explain everything to him—”

I shook my head, the lump in my throat growing with every passing second. “No. You didn’t see the way he looked at me.

He’s not going to listen to anything I say.”

“But everything can be fixed by talking if you truly love each other—”

“This isn’t one of your bloody romance novels,” I snapped.

The words came out harsher than intended, enough to make her wince. Nice going, Seth. Hurt everyone else who matters as well, just push them all away. “Nothing’s ever that perfect. I don’t love him. And he most definitely doesn’t love me anymore, if he ever did.”

“But—”

“Evelyn.” I gently took hold of her shoulders, trying my best to soften my voice when I lied, “It’s okay. I’m not sad about it.”