Vanessa stifled a small laugh. She knew within her heart that he wouldn’t come. There was always something more important than his family. Than Wren. He was no father to him at all.

So she wasn’t surprised that he wasn’t at the hospital waiting for her. Nor was he there when the doctor told her gently that there was no heartbeat and that her baby had died in the womb, the umbilical cord wrapped around her tiny neck. Her baby girl would be born dead.

Vanessa lay on the bed in shock, her whole body shaking. Her teeth chattered and she couldn’t seem to get warm no matter how many blankets they put on her. She was numb. Having to deliver her dead child was the most horrific thing she had ever done. Worse than anything Mark had inflicted upon her.

The nurse called her mom and soon after, she came striding through the door, her gaze immediately falling on Vanessa who burst into tears. Her mom sat on the edge of the bed and gathered Vanessa into her arms. ‘I know, baby. I know.’ The nurses caring for her gave the mother and daughter their privacy, and they stayed locked in an embrace for a long time. Vanessa’s eyes were puffy and red, her heart was broken.

‘I lost her, Mom. I did this.’

‘It’s not your fault, Ness. I know it doesn’t feel like it now, but it’s not.’

‘Where’s Mark?’ Vanessa asked, her voice hoarse from crying. Her throat felt ripped raw, like her heart, torn into tatters.

‘We can’t get ahold of him.’

‘But the bar must be closed by now. Did you try his cellphone?’

‘Yes, darl. He’s not answering.’ Her mom bit her bottom lip, clearly wanting to say more about the absentee Mark, but she held her tongue.

Vanessa rolled over on the bed. ‘I lost his child and he can’t even be bothered to show up.’ She didn’t know why she had expected anything else of him. Was he at home purposefully ignoring the hospital and her mom’s calls? Was he that callous? She thought of his hands on her throughout her pregnancy. Yes, he was.

Her mom rubbed her back until she finally fell into an uneasy sleep plagued with nightmares. She stayed in hospital for two more days, her mom taking care of Wren at her parents’ home. She had explained to Wren that Mommy wouldn’t be bringing a baby home with her because the baby had gone to heaven. Mark never came to see her. He didn’t even ring to check on her or to see how Wren was, or even find out where he was.