Cover

Dedication

For mum, a survivor

Part I

1

Life wasn’t meant to be easy. This was the realization that Vanessa Sawyer had come to. Nothing in her life had turned out the way she had planned, except motherhood, and even then, it had not been an easy road. But she loved her kids, Wren and Ty. They had saved her; they were the reason she woke up in the morning.

She’d married young, just gone eighteen. Mark, her husband, had been in her year at high school and had been dating her best friend Maggie for months. He was nice, charming, popular, and she’d had a crush on him for a while. Looking back, Vanessa could now admit that it was him who had put this whole thing in motion, but she had allowed it by letting herself be swayed by his advances. And she had paid for it.

The high-school dance. An evening of supposedly innocent fun, that ended up staying with Vanessa forever. Maggie left the dance early, saying she didn’t feel well. Mark called her parents to ask them to come and get her. Tucking her into the back seat of the car, he kissed her cheek like a good boyfriend. A truly good boyfriend would have driven her home himself, but he didn’t want to. That much was obvious. Perhaps Vanessa’s entire relationship with Mark would never have happened had he driven Maggie home, but then she would never have fallen pregnant with Wren, her beautiful boy. When Mark strolled back into the hall, his eyes caught hers. He reached for her upper arm and held it firmly. She felt the electricity between them, the thrill of the unexpected and forbidden. He rubbed his thumb along her skin in a way that was entirely too familiar. She tried to pull away.

‘Come with me,’ he said, just loud enough so only she could hear him. Vanessa saw the heat, the desire in his eyes as he led her out into the cool evening air. Outside, the thumping music was muted, and fractured clouds streamed across the moon, casting dappled light onto their clandestine meeting.