I think my face is wet, but I wipe it with the back of my sleeve and pretend it’s not. “He never cried; he tried to pretend that he was fine for me, but at night he would sit in his chair and stare at his hands. I used to watch him. He’d do that for hours.” I straighten to my full height, which towers over her, but she doesn’t cower or look away; instead, she keeps her eyes glued to mine. It softens me and I have to look away. “Why are you back?” I am thirteen, watching her pack a suitcase and walk out the door.

“For you.” When her eyes meet mine, they are unwavering, steellike. My heart thumps painfully at the sudden glimpse of her as the mom I remember. The one who sat with Ruth after her husband left, the one who comforted a dying seal, the one who made sure Tate had clothes to wear and a good haircut. The one who loved me.

“And for Vance. But it was just too damn late.” Her face crumples and she grabs for the back of the closest chair, falls into it as though the strength has drained from her legs.

A current of pain runs through me at her grief.

“But it’s not too late for you, Claire, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to waste this precious second chance.” She sits up straight. “Do you remember my nightmares?”

I give a tight nod. They were always worse when Dad was on the road. I’d climb into bed with her and stroke her hair, try to comfort her. She would never wake up, but eventually she’d stop whimpering.

“I’d wake up to your skinny little arms around my neck, your chubby face pressed into mine.” She’s smiling, even if her eyes glisten. “You were always there for me, sweetheart, and I was too weak to be your mother. It’s the greatest regret of my life.” She stands, breathes in. “But I don’t live in the past anymore. I live for this moment, right now.” She approaches me, takes my hands in her own, and standing in front of her, I feel big and clumsy—a child. “I’m not going anywhere, Claire. And I don’t need for you to be normal or perfect, because I love you exactly as you are right now in this minute, and I’ll keep telling you that until my last breath.”