Lena’s phone hadn’t stopped vibrating in her pocket this whole time. What was waiting there when she pulled it out?

‘Dead battery. Gimme yours.’

Kylie handed it over before she’d finished asking. A newer model than Lena’s but with a spider web crack over the top half of the screen. Lena added her number. Said goodbye. Kylie closed the space between them in an instant, gave her a rough, hard, fast hug and then disappeared back into the apartment.

At the bottom of the stairs Lena leant against the wall, waiting for her legs to catch up to her heart. When was the last time anyone other than Nic had hugged her? Josh, when he said goodbye to her after they fucked. And before that? Annie a few times when she was smashed. Mum, saying goodbye at the train station more than nine months ago.

Her phone buzzed and she pulled it out. A fuckload of notifications, but at the top, just arrived from Kylie: Glad your back nerd i bawled my eyes out when you left shutup but i did stay in touch xxxxxxx

Lena scanned through the messages that had banked up in the hour she’d been in the supermarket and at Kylie’s. A missed call from Will. One text each from Lou, Annie and Mum. Eight unknown numbers. Three unlisted numbers. Two from Nic. Four from Josh.

I guess you’ve blocked me and I’m sending this into a void. Have to try

Can’t stop thinking about you

If you’d give me a chance to explain

Just meet with me one time then Ill never contact you again if thats what you really want. Please

She stared at the phone. How could she speak to Nic without telling her about the giant yellow skip, to Mum and Will without admitting she’d quit her job and, by the way, was an accidental porn star, to Annie or Lou without letting on how broken and disgusting and ashamed she felt? How could she respond to Josh with anything except a raw, guttural scream?

She deleted everything. Called no one back. Decided to skip the hospital for the second day in a row. When your whole life has become unspeakable, you’d best avoid speaking.

WILL

WILL

Will was waiting on Aunty Nic’s porch when Lena started up the path. He’d been planning to leap up and shout, Surprise! but her expression as she approached was pure terror, like there was an axe murderer charging at her. He barked with laughter, snapped a series of fast photos as recognition hit.

‘Will? Holy fuck! You bastard! Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?’

‘Wanted to surprise you. Which, mission accomplished. Your face, mate. Bloody unreal.’