As predicted, the Maurice Minor story made its way around the entire department by the end of my shift, and there are still a few giggles as we prepare for our briefing the following morning. Five minutes into the briefing, a man bursts in, looking rattled.

‘Ah, Dr Milne,’ Dr Patel says dryly. ‘Nice of you to join us. We start at eight, for future information.’

‘I’m so sorry I’m late,’ he tells her. ‘I couldn’t find anywhere to park.’

Uh-oh, I think to myself. One of the many things you learn quickly about Dr Patel is that she has no time for excuses.

‘That must have been very trying for you,’ she tells him, the note of sarcasm in her voice as big a warning signal as a rattlesnake shaking its tail. ‘Parking is always a challenge at any hospital, and yet we all seem to have managed it. Might I suggest you allow more time in future?’

He opens his mouth to speak, but the expression on her face evidently makes him think better of it, and he ends up nodding mutely.

‘Right,’ Dr Patel says, having made sure that the new arrival has got the message. ‘Please continue, Dr Kozlov.’

‘As I was saying,’ Dr Kozlov, the consultant from the previous night shift, says with a heavy sigh, looking pointedly at a blushing Dr Milne, ‘bay five has Mr Jones, who has complex fractures of the femur, having been involved in a road traffic accident in which his motorbike collided with a car just after midnight last night. He’s stable, and we’re keeping him comfortable until theatre are ready for him. No obvious complications, he’s a lucky man, but we’re keeping him under close observation just in case. No evidence of concussion or other head injury. He does have considerable bruising of the torso and two fractured ribs, but these are to be expected. Any questions before we move on?’

The meeting continues in much the same vein as Dr Kozlov takes us through each patient currently in Majors. Once he’s finished, he stands aside to let Dr Patel finish the briefing. Unusually, we haven’t been interrupted by any urgent new arrivals this morning.

‘Everyone, this is Dr Milne,’ she tells us at the end. ‘He’s a junior doctor and it’s his first day with us. Tilly, I’d like you to take him under your wing to begin with, please.’ She turns to Dr Milne. ‘Tilly is one of our senior nurses, so she’ll show you the ropes and get you up to speed. Remember, all medical interventions need to be agreed with me or one of the other duty consultants. I don’t know what it was like where you came from, Dr Milne, but we operate a tight ship. Any questions from anyone?’ She looks around the room. ‘Good. Why are you all still here then?’