Another big sigh. ‘Her name is Cass. I first met her a couple of years ago when I was out with some friends from work, and she was behind the bar of the place we were at. She was quite flirty, but some people just are, aren’t they? So I didn’t give it any thought until one of my friends pointed out that I was the only one in that bar getting the full puppy-dog eyes from her. Anyway, I was in a good mood as we’d just finished a successful project and I had a couple of pints of Dutch courage inside me, so I asked for her number when she came to clear the glasses off the table.’

‘OK.’ I’m not sure where this is going, but I can see he needs to get it off his chest. ‘Did she give it to you?’

‘Oh, yes. We met up the next day, got on brilliantly and that was that.’

‘A whirlwind romance.’ I already hate her for the feeling of jealousy that’s unexpectedly settled in the pit of my stomach.

He smiles ruefully. ‘I guess so. I’ll admit that I fell for her hard, and it seemed like no time had passed before we were talking about moving in together.’

‘And did you?’

‘Yes, and everything was rosy, to begin with at least.’

‘What happened?’ I haven’t enjoyed this story at all so far, so I’m hoping that she’ll turn out to have been a three-headed witch at the very least.

‘When I explained to her about my dyslexia, she made all the right noises, but it quickly became clear she hadn’t taken in what I’d said at all. She used to get frustrated when I couldn’t read things fast enough. She’d demand that I write something down and then have a go at me because it wasn’t spelled correctly. She even bought me some workbooks designed for a five-year-old at one point. She said she was determined to cure me.’

I definitely hate her now.

‘That’s horrible,’ I say, more vehemently than I expected. ‘I hope you told her where to stick her workbooks.’

‘I should have. I realise that now, but I was in love and I genuinely thought she was trying to help, so I did them to make her happy. Honestly, I felt like an idiot filling in questions about which was the green square and what colour the circle was.’

‘And did it make her happy?’

‘No. She just got more and more snappy with me as time went on and there wasn’t any improvement. The happy, bubbly woman I’d fallen for turned into a hissing cloud of resentment. In her mind, my lack of progress was purely because I wasn’t trying hard enough.’

‘She sounds like an absolute charmer.’