If my jaw hadn’t been hinged to my face, it would have dropped into my lap at that number—eight months! If there was one thing Tony and I had never lacked, it was sexual chemistry. I knew how to keep my man satisfied, and let’s just say it wasn’t through my Italian cooking. As for masturbation, I knew how he felt. I could barely get through a week myself without paddling the ol’ pink canoe.

“I’m so sorry, Grant. I had no idea it was that bad. Do you know why?”

“Like I said, the kids. Work. Extracurricular activities. You name it, it’s coming between us. The second we get alone time, Collette wakes up screaming. The moment I try to get frisky with Robin in the shower, Lucas barges in wanting Daddy shower time. That damn baby is always attached to her boob like a friggin’ milk vampire. I can’t win. And I don’t know if I want to keep working at it. We’ve grown apart. I hardly know her anymore. I don’t think she knows me either. When you’ve been married as long as we have, things get . . . more than just tough. Sometimes you can’t go back to what you had; it’s easier to move forward into something new.”

“Grant, we’re not talking about a new pair of shoes here. We’re talking about a marriage. Kids. A home. Family. You can’t just throw that away because you want something new.”

“I don’t just want something new, Lily. I’m trying to tell you . . . I want you. I want you, Lily. I’m in love with you, and I don’t know how to turn it off. You’re all I think about, morning, noon, and night. You’re everything I ever desired in a woman. Feisty. Passionate. Fun. Sexy. I hate that I feel this way, because I know it’s wrong, but it’s real. It’s the realest thing I’ve felt in a long time. And I don’t know what to do about it anymore.”

This couldn’t be happening. I wanted his attention, but not his heart. And yet here he was, pouring it out on the floor in front of me. I wanted to wade in it . . . but I couldn’t. I shouldn’t. Damn, the temptation was so strong.

“What do you think you should do about it?” My words were a whisper. I could feel the high of the drugs, of the pheromones surging through me. My control slipped through my fingers.

In one heartbeat his thigh was touching mine. His hand pulling mine. His fingers intertwining with mine. The room warped as my vision swayed under his spell.

“I know what I want to do about it.”

“Tell me.”

“No. I’ll show you.”