Chapters (68)
I slap my hands against the walls, the tile floor, but nothing stops the bloom of red climbing my fingers to my elbows. Bloodred fire ignites at the tips of my fingers and races to my elbows in a loud whoosh. Even under the water, the blaze grows brighter and wraps around my elbows like glowing vines.
The fire scalds my skin without burning, flickers over my nose like wild butterflies.
Spots in my vision bleed from tiny black dots into swirling obsidian pools. I fall to my knees, hand splayed across the tiles, heart pounding against my rib cage.
Mage flame.
That’s what this is.
It’s not silver-blue like Sel’s or the Legendborns’, or green like the hounds’, but it’s still mage flame.
Knowing what it is doesn’t explain why it’s here.
Why it’s the sickening, raw color of a fresh wound.
Why the flame feels like it’s coming from inside me.
The only beings I’ve seen leak flame from their bodies are demons. Sel already thinks I’m Shadowborn. If he sees me like this—
“Oh God,” I whimper.
There must be other explanations: It’s my body’s delayed reaction to the Oath. It’s Sel’s aether still lingering on my skin, turned sour from my resistance. It’s something the uchel put in me when he opened me up. Any could be true, or none. The bottom line is the same: If I can’t explain what’s happening, then I have to find a way to control it, because if I can’t control it…
You know I will, don’t you? Kill you. And you know I can.
I squeeze my eyes shut. Find my barrier. Shape it into every image I’ve ever used to contain After-Bree and her explosive, dangerous rage—and then some.
A wall made of brick. Made of steel. With bolts the size of my fist.
A blockade a mile high.
Tall enough to contain a giant, strong enough to hold back a god.
A bank vault with two-foot-thick bulletproof doors.
Unbreakable metals, uncrackable surfaces, unscalable heights.
I push all of me behind all of them.
No fissures, no seams, no way in or out.
I shove and heave and cry until I’m safe behind my wall.
And when I open my eyes, the flames are gone.
18
WHEN I WAKE up, my head is clear. I’m tired, but I feel like myself.
I slip my satin scarf off and tug on a few damp curls. Let the shiny strands wrap around my fingers, then pop back into place.
My arms look normal again. Familiar. Ordinary.
Except what happened last night was not ordinary.