And when I look away from Andrew and Dylan, I catch Jack staring at me from across the countertop; I quickly drop my gaze down to the laminated schedule on the counter.

Awkward interactions between Jack and Ellie: 192 hours.

Chapter Eleven

First family walk in the snow: two hours involves matching Christmas sweaters.

“Okay!” Katherine claps her hands together enthusiastically as we finish brunch. “It’s Jacqueline’s year to choose the Christmas sweaters.” Katherine shoots her daughter a weary look. “And hopefully, this time, she took that duty seriously.”

“Sugar,” Jack says in a perfect imitation of Meemaw, “I take everything seriously.”

Jack takes very few things seriously, as evidenced by the reusable New Seasons bags she produces, containing some of the most outlandish Christmas sweaters I’ve ever seen. Her own says “Don We Now Our Gay Apparel,” Andrew’s is somehow sexually suggestive and festive, Katherine’s is three sizes too big, and Lovey’s has a picture of a Christmas tree and the words “Get Lit” across the top. Dylan’s features a tower of presents arranged to look like either a raised middle finger or an erect penis. Regardless, Dylan gives their best friend an approving chin nod. “This is dope.”

I end up with the extra Christmas sweater, and it’s an absolute atrocity with tinsel dangling from the waist, a weird RBG-style fringe around the neckline, and two dozen plastic presents sticking out from my breasts. Jack hides her laughter behind a well-timed cough. “That looks very nice on you, Ellie,” she manages.

I glare. “Is this some kind of Kim-Prescott hazing ritual?”

Jack arches one eyebrow and shrugs. “Think of it more like a rite of passage.”

“Really, Jacqueline.” Katherine looks slightly horrified by her tent sweater with the words “In a World of Grinches, Be a Griswold” in loopy script across her middle. “Is this what you’ll have us wearing on next year’s Christmas card?”

“Absolutely,” Jack says with a solemn nod. About this, she is perfectly serious. “I think Christmas 2023 is going to need some levity.”

“I think these are perfect!” Meemaw does a little twirl. Her sweater has flashing lights and plays “Jingle Bells” on a loop.

Apparently, the first walk in the snow isn’t about the walk at all; it’s about the family photo they take together in the woods to use for the next year’s Christmas card. This becomes clear when Katherine hands Andrew the tripod to carry and begins fussing with Jack’s hair. The grandmas are both clutching stainless steel-thermoses, and when Katherine side-eyes them, Lovey says, “They’re hot toddies. You want one?”

“It’s twelve thirty.”

“We’re very old, dear,” Meemaw explains. “We need something to keep us warm. You wouldn’t want us catching our deaths out there.”