Meemaw drags me through the house, past the giant living room where the stockings are already hung along the fireplace mantel. Someone has added a plain red one to the end of the lineup, with the name Ellie written in glitter glue. My heart is in my throat as we turn the corner and see a woman in a dark green dress arranging a floral centerpiece on a formal dining room table. Behind me, Andrew clears his throat. “Mom?”

Katherine Kim looks up. She’s a gorgeous, flawlessly tailored Korean American woman in her early sixties, and I lament my Old Navy jeans once again. But Katherine only has eyes for her son, not my haggard appearance, and her face breaks into a smile. “Andrew!” She throws herself at him. “Oh, Merry Christmas! I’m so happy you’re here! It’s so good to have the family together!”

She plants kisses on both of his cheeks, and Andrew relaxes into his mother’s hug. “Mom,” he says when they break apart, “I want to introduce you to Ellie, my fiancée. Ellie, this is my mother, Katherine.”

Katherine is pulling me into a choke hold before I realize what’s happening. “Hello, Mrs. Kim!” I cough as she crushes me against her bony chest. “You have a lovely home!”

She releases me and waves her slender arms around. “No, no, it’s an absolute mess. Please, don’t even look at it! I came up yesterday to try to get things sorted, but there’s always so much to do around the holidays! But my goodness, dear, look at you!” She absently touches the tip of my braid. “It’s so nice to finally meet you!”

Finally? They’ve known about my existence for three days, at most. I try to think of an appropriate response, but a loving mother is touching my braid, and I’m feeling too much in this giant house, surrounding by these loud people, consumed by the unequivocal family Christmas of it all. I hadn’t expected this. In all the dread and panic leading up to this trip, it didn’t occur to me that I would be spending Christmas with a family.

Before I can respond, Katherine Kim bursts into tears.

“Mom!” Andrew moves closer to her with concern. “What’s wrong? What is it?”

Katherine waves her arms around again. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry—but I just can’t believe you’ve had a girlfriend for three months and we haven’t met her. And now you’re engaged, and she’s a stranger to us, and I feel like I’ve failed as your mother, like I haven’t—”