I shake my head. “That’s a mistake you only make once, I promise.”

Jack shakes her head, too, dislodging a few snowflakes. There’s almost three inches on the ground now. The sidewalk and our jeans are both covered in white. I want to draw Jack like this. I want to spend the rest of my life drawing Jack, in the snow and everywhere.

I think, Maybe I’m not getting my heart broken on a bridge right now. I’m really not sure.

“So I think the Claire thing kind of messed me up more than I realized,” she says, puffing out her cheeks. “Just, like, in terms of making me feel like a fuck-up at relationships, too. And I definitely haven’t reconciled all the issues I have with my family not believing in me. And my parents’ divorce is sort of messing me up more than I expected, considering I’ve been actively rooting for it since I was ten. And then there’s all this stuff with my grandpa writing me out of his will. It’s just—”

“You’ve got a lot on your plate, sure.” Never mind, I am getting my heart broken. In the gentle way, where she’s going to tell me she’s too “busy” to date me. Which everyone knows is just something you say when you’re not very into a person but you don’t have a good reason why.

“I’m telling you all of this so you know.” Jack licks her lips, and I think miserably about how I’ll never lick those lips again. “I’m not perfect.”

I snort. “Jack, I was not operating under the assumption that you’re perfect.”

She moves closer to me. Her body sways, then replants itself. “It’s just… I’m really fucking scared of letting you love me back. I’m afraid I’ll get hurt again. And worse, I’m afraid I’ll get lost in a relationship again.”

“Back…” I repeat. I have eight hearts, thirty ribs, and no idea what’s happening.

“Duh.” Jack rolls her shoulders uncomfortably inside her khaki jacket. “Of course I love you, too.”

“Duh? Jack!” I relish in the sound of her name on my tongue, the sight of her crooked smile. “That’s a terrible declaration of love.”

“Should I compare you to a tree and insult the volume of your voice?”

“Fair point.” I take our joined hands and lift them to my mouth, kissing her cold knuckles in the snow. “And Jack—I don’t want you to lose yourself in this relationship. I don’t want you to siphon off any part of who you are.”