I hunker down on the washing machine, staring at Meredith in the blue light of the 3 a.m. laundry room hiding spot. “Okay, the first kiss was not my fault. There was mistletoe and drunk grandmas involved. And the second kiss—yes, fine, I take full responsibility for that one.”

“I guess you’re in one of those morally ambiguous rom coms. Like My Best Friend’s Wedding or Four Weddings and a Funeral.”

“Which am I?” I ask, fairly certain I don’t want to hear the answer. “Julia Roberts or Andie MacDowell?”

“You’re Dermot Mulroney,” Meredith answers. “You’re the douche marrying Cameron Diaz but still overtly flirting with Julia Roberts. Because Jack thinks you’re marrying her brother for real, and that she just kissed her brother’s fiancé.”

“But I don’t want to be Dermot Mulroney,” I whine.

“Tough shit.” Apparently Meredith’s capacity for empathy does not activate until after she’s had her coffee. “If you don’t want to be Dermot Mulroney, then you need to come clean to Jack about everything.”

“I can’t! Because of the money!”

Meredith already knows all of this. As soon as the love trapezoid got home from the Mountain Bar (Meemaw and Lovey had to come pick us up, and yes, that was the most awkward car ride of my life), I pretended to go to bed, then absconded with my electronic devices to draw until a less-cruel hour to call Meredith. The panels were sloppy, with an unfocused narrative and too much self-indulgence, but I had no intention of posting them, anyway. I hadn’t posted any more episodes of The Arrangement to Drawn2, not since everything started feeling too personal and too private. But that hasn’t stopped the number of views and likes from growing on the early episodes, my subscriptions from quadrupling, and my inbox from overflowing with unread messages. Even the numbers on the old Snow Day episodes have increased, new readers flocking to it in droves, and I feel slightly disquieted, knowing that story is a thinly veiled version of my story with Jack. At least, the version of our story I knew back then.

Since it was 5 a.m. Meredith’s time, I decided it was an acceptable hour to call a friend in circumstances such as these, and I did. And then I told her everything.

“Look, I advised you to enter this whole marriage scam in the beginning, but that was back when I thought there was a chance for you to fall in love with Andrew, before we found out Jack is his sister. Now the whole thing is just too complicated. As your unofficial lawyer, I’ve got to suggest you cut your fucking losses.”

“It’s not that simple. I’ve made a promise to Andrew, and this isn’t my secret to tell. And it’s not about me anymore. It’s about Jack.”