Theo had told me weed wasn’t addicting the day he convinced me to try it. And maybe it wasn’t, on the outside. Maybe it was. All I knew was the rules were different inside the house. Here, everything became a liability. Even the things that weren’t addictive became vices eventually. This house would discover everything that made your life worth living on the outside, and strip them from you–one by one.

Being under the influence was Theo’s vice, and being sober was something his brain just couldn’t handle. So when he discovered the stores of canned fruit in the pantry, and began carting it to the basement, I didn’t say anything. When he stumbled up the stairs, drunk out of his mind the first time he successfully fermented it, I kept my mouth shut. I never spoke up, but I avoided the basement at all costs.

I had my vices necessary for survival, too. And I didn’t want to think about if they were taken away from me.

Unfortunately, Savannah was quickly becoming one of them. Unfortunately, because I wasn’t the only person in this house she wanted. And I was 99.9% sure I wasn’t the only person she needed, either.

My addiction is what brought my heavy feet to the basement after our argument. I couldn’t leave things unresolved, as much as I wanted her to come to me, begging for forgiveness and my attention. I was well aware she wouldn’t, but the hope was nice. I had fucked up, and if she ran into Theo’s arms and never returned to me because of my judgment, I’d never forgive myself.

Savannah was sweet as sugar on the outside, laced with a steel that hurt your teeth if you bit too hard. I had made the mistake more than once in the beginning, expecting her to back down, and now I was afraid I had messed up my chances with her altogether. Maybe sex would be all it was, and I would have to be grateful for that. After all, it was better than spending night after night alone. But I needed to see if there was something I could do to fix our moonlight relationship first.

So there I stood in front of Theo and Savannah, nervously stuffing my hands into my pockets. The last time I had willed a woman to love me, I ended up cursed while she walked away, never to be seen again.

Savannah’s eyes were wary, but she smiled up at me in the most beautiful way. I wanted to kiss her right then and there, but would she push me away if we didn’t have the passion that came with our arguments and fights?