I reached for her hand. We sat in silence for a moment. Her words sliced through my heart in one seamless motion. We had lost a lot. We had lost our freedom, our lives. Our opportunities and our potential. But hadn’t we gained a lot, too? We had found each other. And maybe, just maybe, we had found parts of ourselves hidden away to the rest of the world. Our close proximity had forced our secrets to the surface, exposing them one by one. I couldn’t speak for the others, but I felt lighter. My soul didn’t feel stuck to the ground anymore, collecting dust as it dragged behind me. There was a chance this was the cleanest my soul had been in decades, scrubbed free of all its stains.

Of course, I didn’t say any of this to Savannah. If I spoke those words aloud, she would stare at me and nod, those same thoughts already echoing in her brain. So we sat quietly, feeding each other’s souls with our presence. Solidifying our spines for another day, another battle against an army we faced with no weapons. No armor. Just our love.

I thought back to the first time I saw Savannah, the first time she snapped back at Felix. This girl, I thought. This woman will turn my world upside down, as small as it was trapped inside this lonely house. And she had, with her sunshine smiles and her quiet presence in the library. She had made me realize we had a chance, while we scoured the books for any kind of escape, never giving up hope. She had shown me love, and lord almighty had she taught me how to fuck. She gave me so much comfort, and right now I wanted nothing more than to wrap my arms around her and watch her fall apart in my hands, building her back up with pleasure in the next moment. It would certainly help with the tension building inside us. But now wasn’t the time or place, so it would have to wait.

Eventually she patted my hand, bending down to press a kiss to my forehead. She didn’t say a word, but I knew she was telling me she was going back to Felix. As she should. I needed sleep, since being tired would make me no help to her the next day.

I squeezed her hand. I love you, I tried to say with my touch. I didn’t want to ruin the moment with words, like our strength would dissipate if we said the wrong thing.

Savannah squeezed back. I love you, too. And then she was gone, my bed slightly cooler without her warm body. I turned to my side, the conflicting emotions fighting each other for dominance before I finally caved to sleep.