“Ruthie, I can see by your pulse that you’re a little stressed,” the voice said. “Don’t worry, everything’s under control.”

“I know.”

“Good. Keep focusing on your breathing. Now I’m going to ask you two to think about the first memory you want to share.”

She tries to remember. Only then does she realize she had no intention of sharing a single memory. That she had agreed to go through with this whole farce only because her son had been so adamant. For a moment, she considers backing out. Or maybe just evoking some trivial, insignificant memory. Lunch break at the office or something like that. Why not share it with Ilan? After all, it would make him so happy. Make both of them happy. She feels she’s resisting the direction the world is heading in, but doesn’t know why.

“Try to remember what was around you that moment, what you saw, what you smelled.”

She feels every muscle in her body rebelling against her. Tensing one by one.

“Try to feel the temperature where you’re at.”

Her body vetoes the request; she sees nothing but black. They’ll be onto her any moment now. They’ll ask her why she isn’t remembering, what the problem is.

“We’ll continue the procedure in a sec,” the voice says, and she knows she’s been made.

The noises from the machine die down.

“We apologize, there’s been a slight glitch. With your permission, we’ll repeat this step. Take a deep breath and think about—”

“Wait,” she says. “I need to go to the bathroom.”

“Can’t you hold it in for a bit?” the voice replies. “It won’t take much longer.”

“No, I have to go now.”

“It’s a little problematic interrupting the treatment in the middle. Could you wait another—”

“No, I can’t. I’m about to pee myself. Hello? Can you hear me?”

After a moment’s silence, the table starts sliding out, slowly. The young woman is standing to her right. “Come, we’ll do it quickly, okay?” she says with that annoying smile of hers. “I’ll walk you there.”

“I don’t need escorting.”

“Better I go with you,” she says, “it’ll be a bit difficult to walk with the sedative we gave you.”

“Everything okay, my Ruthie?”

“Yes, Ilan. Yes. Just popping into the bathroom.”

“No problem, I’ll be waiting here. Love you.”

“Be back in a sec.”

The woman helps her off the table. Ruthie approaches the changing nook, picks up her pants, and takes her phone out of the pocket. The woman tells her there’s no need to take anything with her, but Ruthie ignores her. She feels a bit wobbly and holds on to the woman as they make their way down the hallway.

“You want me to go in with you?”

“No, no, I’m fine.”