I look down, the feeling in my stomach growing more and more painful.

“Listen, creative industries are just super hard to break into,” Darryl says. “I’ve spoken to so many people in music, and they’ve all said the same thing—that you can’t let the rejections stop you.”

“I know. I’m just—”

“People think my band was an overnight success, but we’ve worked so hard to build it up. And we’re not even halfway to where we want to be. So, all I’m saying is: I’m not gonna stop, and you shouldn’t, either.”

“It’s not that simple,” I say, and for a moment, I feel tempted to blurt out something else. A part of me wishes I could tell him about everything that’s going on with my family. I wish I could say that the audition isn’t even the reason I’m upset. In the back of my mind, I can’t help but think of how much easier it would be to tell the truth about my parents to someone who doesn’t know me that well, someone who wouldn’t start seeing me differently, but I stop myself when I remember how much things have already changed with Kimmie and Adam since last week. I can’t ask Darryl to keep a secret from Kimmie, so if I told him the truth, I’d only be making things more complicated.

Darryl’s eyes shift, and when I look over my shoulder, I see that Kimmie is making her way back toward us.

For the rest of lunch, I try not to look at her too much. I already know I haven’t exactly been a great friend lately. I don’t need to remind myself of all the ways I’ve been letting her down.

During breakfast on Friday, I see my own exhaustion reflected on Jorge’s and Amy’s faces. Amy, who usually looks so put-together, has dark circles under her eyes and tangles in her hair. Jorge just looks like he’s about to pass out from lack of sleep. Ellie hasn’t stopped crying at night, so we’ve all been running on only a few hours of rest for the past few days.

The thought of seeing Ma tomorrow is what’s gotten me through this week. It’s what I’ve been thinking about every night while I stare at the ceiling, with Ellie’s crying ringing in my ears, and what I’ve tried to focus on at school to keep my mind off Adam.