It takes me a surprisingly long time to finish restocking the chips. As I pick up the empty boxes to take them to the back, it occurs to me that even if that’s true—even if I don’t deserve a friend like Kimmie—I can’t forget that I need her, now more than ever.

19

OVER THE NEXT COUPLE OF DAYS, I try my hardest to stick to what has become my new routine. I show up at the bodega early in the morning and stay until closing time. I push myself to reply to Kimmie’s texts, apologizing again and again for taking so long to respond, promising her that I’ll try to do better. At night, I watch Pasiones next to my sister, noticing the way she curls up close to me, not moving, not talking, not doing anything except stare blankly at the screen.

On a Monday evening, I give Maria a call, thinking that going on a playdate would be good for Sophie. Right after we agree that I’ll drop my sister off at her apartment at noon tomorrow, Maria gives a long sigh into the phone.

“I’m worried about her,” she says.

“Why?” Even as the word leaves my mouth, I realize I already know the answer. Staring at Sophie from the corner of my eye, I feel pain in my chest. She’s slumped in the farthest corner of the couch, staring down at Jorge’s phone. Even though there’s a movie playing on the TV, all she cares about is hitting the call button again and again, because that’s what she does—if Ma and Pa don’t answer on the first try, she’s incapable of giving up. Last week, she kept calling back for forty-five minutes before they finally picked up.

“She’s been quiet,” Maria tells me. “Too quiet.”

“I—I know. I think she just needs to—”

“Mateo,” she says sharply. “She keeps saying she wants to go live with your parents in Mexico.”

I pull a chair back and slowly sit at the table. “What else has she said?”

“That’s about it. It’s the only thing she talked about last time she came over.”

My heart breaks. I want to put the phone down, run to my sister, and give her a hug, but I can’t move my legs.

“Mateo, I—”

“Thank you, Maria,” I say. “For telling me this.”

She goes silent, and for a couple of minutes, we just breathe quietly through the phone. “So you’ll drop Sophie off at noon, right?”

“Yes,” I say. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”