“That’s the thing. He didn’t just get a callback,” Kimmie says, and her face turns very serious. “He got the part.”

“What?” Maybe it’s just the fact that the light of the sun is blinding me, but all of a sudden, everything starts looking a little artificial. “He—he got it?”

Kimmie nods.

“Wow. I don’t even—”

Adam’s voice appears suddenly. “What are we talking about?”

Kimmie and I turn around at the same time. I meet Adam’s eyes, and my whole body stiffens. I want to say something, but even my jaw has tightened. No matter how hard I try to speak, the words just won’t come out.

Adam puts his hands in his pockets. “I guess Kimmie told you.”

I nod. All of this feels so wrong. He shouldn’t look ashamed. He should be excited, and I should be hugging him, and we should be jumping up and down. I mean, he got a part in an off-Broadway play! We’ve been dreaming about something like this from the moment we first became friends.

“When did this happen?” I ask when I finally find my voice.

“Friday afternoon. The producers called and offered me the part.”

“And when do you start rehearsals?” I ask, because if I keep asking questions, at least there won’t be awkward silence between us.

“In a few weeks,” he says.

I can’t think of anything else to say. I’m trying hard to come up with something, to find a way to make Adam understand that I’m not jealous, that I’m happy for him, that the audition isn’t even the reason I’ve been acting weird. But as the silence stretches on, and Kimmie and Adam keep staring fixedly at me, I start feeling very hot, and I can’t stop myself from blurting out the first thing that comes to my mind.

“I—I’m happy for you. I mean, it’s only a stupid role.”

Adam’s eyes go wide. “What is that supposed to mean?”

I know exactly what it meant, but now all I can think about is how it must’ve sounded to Adam.

“I didn’t mean it that way,” I say quickly. My heart starts beating fast, and my face keeps getting hotter and hotter. I can feel my friends’ eyes on me, and I’m starting to worry that if I don’t get this right, my wall will crumble and I’ll have to lay it all out in the open. “I was so wrecked after I screwed up my audition—you know I was. What I’m trying to say is: It was only one role—one of many that we’re gonna audition for. It’s not like I can’t be happy for you because you got this one and I didn’t.”