I’ve never really met someone who makes me feel that way—someone it’s hard to be around, someone who makes me giggle the way Kimmie was doing earlier. At most, I can say I had a short-lived thing for Adam when we first met back in freshman year. There was something about his long hair, his deep voice, and his Herschel backpack that was so… cool to me. But soon enough, the three of us started hanging out, and it felt like we could never be anything more than friends, so I went back to waiting—waiting to feel something, to find the right guy. I just hate thinking that I might have to wait until college to meet someone.

“Let’s not talk about Darryl anymore,” Kimmie says when we reach the front of the line. “Come on, what are you guys getting?”

Dinner is different on Wednesday night. It has been a full week since the ICE agents came to the bodega looking for Pa, and there’s been no sign of them since then. Ma makes a bigger meal than usual, which feels almost like a subtle sign that we’re celebrating something. Sophie won’t shut up about the school trip she went on yesterday—she and her second-grade class went to the Museum of Natural History—and Pa seems happier, more relaxed.

“You know who I bumped into on Eighth Avenue?” he says. “Carlos Acevedo.”

“And how is he doing?” Ma asks.

“He’s good, but he said his little girl is recovering from the flu.” I don’t know how he does it, but Pa has a way of making the city feel small. He seems to know everyone. “He asked me to say hi to all of you.”

All week, it has felt like we’ve been waiting for something. I just wasn’t sure what it was. Now I realize this is what we’ve been waiting for—a sign that everything is going to be all right. Because if the agents haven’t come back in a full week, why would they come back now? It may just be false hope, but at least for the remainder of dinner, we choose to pretend that everything has gone back to the way it used to be.

It isn’t really until later, when I’m watching Pasiones de tu Corazón with Ma, that I realize just how much lighter I feel. The weight I’ve been carrying for a full week is completely gone. I hadn’t noticed just how heavy it was until now that it’s no longer weighing me down.

During the opening credits, Ma turns to look at me, and I see it in her eyes—she feels lighter, too. She may say I feel too much, but she doesn’t always admit how similar the two of us are. She’s also used to carrying a little more than she should.