She wrote to Aubrey regularly and frequently because it was her duty, and besides she was at the mercy of illogical superstition. She’d made a deal with God that if she continued to behave as a respectable, dutiful wife then He’d keep Howard safe. Even if she couldn’t have Howard, even if he no longer wanted her, his safety was paramount to her. She valued his life above her own. Why hadn’t he known that? She would have given him up rather than allowed him to go to war; how could he have doubted that? Now he was out there, suffering. And she was here, alone. They could have chosen an easier path.

If she planned to write to both men, she would write to her husband first, dashing something out, desperate to savour the moments when she could luxuriate in writing to Howard.

Dear Aubrey,

I hope this letter finds you well. Congratulations on your latest promotion.

Mabel’s birthday tea party was a tremendous success. All the village children seemed to enjoy the day; no one behaved roughly, which I know was your concern. She wore a pink dress that my mother sent from London. It’s rather too fine for the country but she looked really very pretty. She’s grown quite tall since your last leave. I’m sure you’d find her delightful. Everyone does.

The rations that the government have decreed are fully adequate, thank you for asking. Besides, as you can imagine, we do rather better than most as we can supplement our diets with anything we can grow or nurture on the farm. You do not need to worry about us. Please don’t.

I do understand that leave is ever more constrained, of course, I am sure you are doing your best to visit when you can. I agree that it makes more sense for you to spend time in Paris; if you only have three days why would you want to spend two of them travelling?

I pray for peace.

Fond wishes,

Vivian

It was safest to confine matters to Mabel and the farm. She found that she started lots of new paragraphs to stretch out the length of her letters, and they had always been in the habit of signing them off, ‘Fond wishes’, a precedent Aubrey had set in 1914. Now, her duty dispensed, she could write to Howard with a clear conscience.

My darling, darling Howard,