“I know, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less,” I whispered. “Ugh, why the fuck did you make me talk about this, Amelia?”

“Because you never talk about your feelings, Darcy. You just keep ‘em bottled up inside, and that’s just not healthy, you know. Bottlin’ up your emotions can cause cancer.”

“Amelia!” James snapped. “Do your thoughts pass through any sort of filter before they come out of your mouth?”

“Shit, Darcy, I’m sorry!” my little sister said, wide-eyed and apologetic. “It happened so long ago that I forget sometimes.”

“Sure.” I didn’t believe that for one minute. The reason why Jared was an only child was directly tied to her remembering that I’d had cervical cancer. She knew what she was doing, but I wasn’t going to waste time arguing with her either.

Like a lifesaving beacon, my phone began to dance and vibrate on the table.

*wedding rehearsal at 6:45*

“Wow, everyone will be here in a few for the wedding rehearsal. Those couple of hours flew by, huh? I’m gonna go upstairs and freshen up.” I pushed Amelia’s feet off of my lap and stood up.

“Darcy, really, I didn’t mean to—”

“It’s fine, Amelia,” I called over my shoulder.

But it wasn’t fine. Yes, I was blessed to have all of the things I had: parents that were able to pay for my education, a beautiful and intelligent son, a reputable business, a historic home, and the money to send my son and his new wife on a seven-day Caribbean honeymoon. And yes, I was grateful for those things, but I was also acutely aware of the things I didn’t have. Those things probably seemed like minor inconveniences to Amelia, who was pregnant with her fourth child and had a doting husband, and James, who was a self-proclaimed spinster who had no desire for either.

I sighed and closed the door to the master bathroom behind me. It was warmer up here on the second floor but not unbearable. Leaning over the sink, I checked my makeup. My foundation had started to break down a little bit, so I grabbed a few blotting papers to take care of the shiny spots and went over my whole face with a blending brush. My phone jangled and vibrated in my pocket, but it wasn’t a scheduled alert this time, so I pulled it out to see who it was.

A voice text from Tommy. I pushed play.

“Hey, um. I don’t know if this is out of bounds, but I just wanted to let you know that the moment that reminder for the rehearsal dinner came through, I thought about sitting with you in your study and holding your hand. And you with that look on your face like you wanted me to kiss you. Did you want me to kiss you? I should have just asked. Was that a missed opportunity?”