“Mother,” I answer and I can’t hide the chill in my tone.

I know that’s a protective response. That’s my body reacting to the trauma of my past. I want to be ready for anything she might say or do, so all my senses prepare to take in every word.

“The news, Haley. Have you been watching?”

I take a deep breath, even though I know she’s waiting for me to respond. I can choose to do that however I want. I can hang up the phone, if I want. I can refuse to answer. But that feels like running away without addressing the problem, and I don’t want to do that.

“I’ve asked you to leave me alone,” I tell her, as calmly as I can. “If you call me again, I’ll have the protective order enforced. I’ll go to the judge and tell them you violated it. You know the terms.”

My mom scoffs. There’s a small shake in her voice. “That restraining order is bullshit and you know it, Haley.”

“It’s not bullshit, and you know that, too. We’ve had this conversation before, and I’m getting tired of having to repeat it over and over again.”

“I want to help.” Her voice quavers even more. “I want to help you, Haley. I want to be there for you.”

“That’s not an option for you.”

“But it should be. I’ve apologized. I’ve told you so many times that I didn’t⁠—”

“And I’ve told you that I don’t want to hear from you. You can help me by leaving me alone. If you really care about what I want, you’ll stop violating the restraining order.”

“That order isn’t right.” Her tone turns pleading and defeated, like she really thought I’d change my mind this time. There’s no doubt in my mind that my mom watched the same news broadcast I just did. I don’t know how it made her think she should call me. “It kills me that I can’t be there for you when⁠—”

“When what, Mom? There’s nothing to help me with. You watched whatever you watched, and I’m still not interested in having any contact with you. I’ll never want to have contact with you again. That’s because of what you did.”

“Haley—”

“You can’t go back and change what you’ve done, and I can’t change what I went through and how you didn’t believe me. How you tried to send me back! Now I’m choosing to move forward with my life. That means moving forward without you. That’s my decision, and it’s final.”

“I saw that man outside your office,” her voice cuts through, as if she didn’t hear what I said. She never hears me. She never has.