That’s just a daydream. I’ll never have a chance to break the window. Even if I could climb that high and keep myself up there, I wouldn’t have time. I’m strong enough to make it to the ledge, but like I said, we’re never alone. The man standing in the door could reach me before I threw the first punch, and he wouldn’t stop at pulling me down to the floor. He’d get a few punches in, too. I’d end up restrained at best and tortured by myself for who knows how long.

And then drugged up again. They force pills down the throats of the ones who fight back. They keep us weak.

I’m not thinking about that when I unzip the black slacks they gave me. I’m not even thinking about how that sick fuck is watching, or how they pretend it’s for our own good. I’m used to the fact that we’re never alone by now. I’m used to the smell of bleach and piss. I’m used to thinking that it smells like a prison and calling this a school is somebody’s idea of a joke.

I’m not used to thinking about a girl.

I haven’t stopped thinking about her since I saw her through the one-way mirror earlier in the night.

It’s obviously not a one-way mirror. There’s no sense arguing the point, though, because the people who run this place will just beat it out of us. There’s no convincing them because they know they’re lying. It’s enough that I know I can see through that damn window.

It’s a punishment if we do it. The lying. They scream in our face and the spit and smell of rancid coffee is enough to make me vomit. Liar! Fucking liar! They scream until my chest vibrates. Even if we’re telling the truth.

But they can lie to us. They can say we can’t see through it and we have to agree.

I was so surprised when I saw her sitting there. Her eyes were so wide and scared and sad, and she was still wet. Her hair all around her shoulders, wet and curling. She was shivering and cold, trying to warm herself up without moving. I didn’t expect anyone to be brought in and I wasn’t waiting for it.

I shouldn’t have looked but I remember that day. I don't remember how long ago, it’s been months since I was brought here at this point. Looking though… I shouldn’t have looked. That was just an excuse for more punishment, and my own mistake. I knew looking at her would earn me some strikes, and I knew saying anything about her would earn me more.