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Chapters (42)
  1. Cover
  2. Praise for Luan Goldie
  3. About the Author
  4. Also by Luan Goldie
  5. Note to Readers
  6. Dedication
  7. Chapter One
  8. Chapter Two
  9. Chapter Three
  10. Chapter Four
  11. Chapter Five
  12. Chapter Six
  13. Chapter Seven
  14. Chapter Eight
  15. Chapter Nine
  16. Chapter Ten
  17. Chapter Eleven
  18. Chapter Twelve
  19. Chapter Thirteen
  20. Chapter Fourteen
  21. Chapter Fifteen
  22. Chapter Sixteen
  23. Chapter Seventeen
  24. Chapter Eighteen
  25. Chapter Nineteen
  26. Chapter Twenty
  27. Chapter Twenty-One
  28. Chapter Twenty-Two
  29. Chapter Twenty-Three
  30. Chapter Twenty-Four
  31. Chapter Twenty-Five
  32. Chapter Twenty-Six
  33. Chapter Twenty-Seven
  34. Chapter Twenty-Eight
  35. Chapter Twenty-Nine
  36. Acknowledgements
  37. Extract
  38. Saturday, 4 May 1996
  39. Chapter One
  40. Chapter Two
  41. Chapter Three
  42. About the Publisher

Yvonne should never have come tonight. She knew it would feel like this, somehow dishonest. She’s not even at the end of the road when she takes her phone out and checks to see if he’s sent her a text. She smiles as she opens it, reading his brief message. Call me when you’re done. It’s only just gone half eleven, she should make him wait, at least until after midnight. But then if he’s going to invite her over she needs to know before she gets on the tube and loses reception. She loiters outside the station, watching the pickpockets and tipsy office workers, her finger poised on the call button.

Emma was right, it is cold. She zips up the jacket, which smells of cigarette smoke and Tommy Girl, and hits call. The phone rings several times and she prays it doesn’t go to voicemail.

He picks up. ‘Hey.’

‘Hey.’ She blushes at the sound of his voice. It’s always like this with him, she’s not sure if it’s because they never see each other enough to get fully comfortable, or if it’s something more than that. The way she feels about him is so much more all-consuming than she’s ever felt about anyone else.

‘How was the party?’ he asks.

‘It was okay. But I didn’t really know anyone there.’

‘And how was the Princess?’

Never before has he asked about Emma. She was the subject they both happily avoided.

‘Fine,’ she answers, her voice small; she doesn’t want to talk about Emma with him. It was weird enough telling him whose party she was going to in the first place.

‘Did you guys talk?’

‘About what?’

He sniggers. About him, that’s what he wants to hear, that they compared notes. ‘I don’t know. Girl stuff?’

‘Lewis.’

‘No, you’re right. It’s none of my business.’

‘I didn’t tell her, if that’s what you’re asking me.’

There’s a silence.

A group of drunken women in tights and trainers ask a station attendant the times of the last tube. She can’t stand around here for much longer. She needs to make a decision.

‘So,’ he says. ‘What time do you think you’ll get here?’

‘I didn’t say I was coming over.’

He laughs. ‘But my brother’s gone out. I’m alone and don’t know what to do with myself.’

She sighs. She shouldn’t go there. Not now. She shouldn’t play it so easy. ‘I have work in the morning. At eight.’

‘You have work every morning. Come over, you know I always wake you up on time.’

‘I’ve been at a party, I’m tired. What makes you think I want to come all the way up to yours?’ She’s not even convincing herself.

‘You can read a book on the tube.’