Chapters (42)
- Cover
- Praise for Luan Goldie
- About the Author
- Also by Luan Goldie
- Note to Readers
- Dedication
- Chapter One
- Chapter Two
- Chapter Three
- Chapter Four
- Chapter Five
- Chapter Six
- Chapter Seven
- Chapter Eight
- Chapter Nine
- Chapter Ten
- Chapter Eleven
- Chapter Twelve
- Chapter Thirteen
- Chapter Fourteen
- Chapter Fifteen
- Chapter Sixteen
- Chapter Seventeen
- Chapter Eighteen
- Chapter Nineteen
- Chapter Twenty
- Chapter Twenty-One
- Chapter Twenty-Two
- Chapter Twenty-Three
- Chapter Twenty-Four
- Chapter Twenty-Five
- Chapter Twenty-Six
- Chapter Twenty-Seven
- Chapter Twenty-Eight
- Chapter Twenty-Nine
- Acknowledgements
- Extract
- Saturday, 4 May 1996
- Chapter One
- Chapter Two
- Chapter Three
- About the Publisher
‘Once a fortnight,’ he repeats. ‘What kind of relationship can we have on that? I keep telling her to give him a phone. All the kids have phones now.’
‘What does he need a phone for?’
‘To talk to me. He doesn’t need to take it to school, just a cheap pay-as-you-go thing he could message me on. That way I could keep a check on him. Make sure Emma is coping alright.’
‘She does more than cope,’ Yvonne snaps.
Lewis looks up. ‘Don’t try to switch sides now. You know she’s struggling. My mum said the last time she went over the flat was a mess.’
‘Emma’s flat is always a mess, Lewis. That’s nothing new. And it’s no reflection on how she’s coping.’
‘And we both knew she was too lazy to keep up the job, how long did that last? A month? And then she’s surprised there’s not enough money.’
‘I don’t want to hear this,’ she says calmly. ‘This has nothing to do with me.’
But he keeps on.
‘I’m the one paying for everything but it’s still not enough for her. Just bought all the new school uniform and trainers and she’s going on like I don’t support her.’
There’s more to raising a kid than buying trainers, Emma had said this once, as she held a new pair of Nikes Lewis bought for Kiama. £120 they cost, the same amount as Emma’s rent arrears.
‘£12 a session for this tutor. It adds up. Maybe if she didn’t allow him to take so many days off school he would be able to catch up a bit quicker.’
Yvonne raises her hands, ‘Emma does her best. And she’s alone. It must be hard.’
‘She’s not raising him alone, Yvie. I know that’s what she likes people to think. But I’m there for my son. I support him. I’ve seen him almost every month since he was born.’
‘Every month? Really? Well done, Lewis, what do you want? A medal?’
‘Where the hell did that come from?’
She’s never heard him raise his voice, he sounds like a different person. But she’s not going to back down now. ‘Emma’s put everything into raising Kiama. I’ve seen it. I’ve watched her struggle for years.’
‘You think I’m a shit dad?’
‘No. No, of course I don’t. The same way I don’t think Emma is a shit mum.’
He looks away from her and his jaw flexes slightly. ‘Now I know the reason we never talk about this stuff. I’m going.’
She follows him into the hallway and watches as he makes his way down the stairs.
‘Lewis?’ she calls after him.