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Chapters (42)
  1. Cover
  2. Praise for Luan Goldie
  3. About the Author
  4. Also by Luan Goldie
  5. Note to Readers
  6. Dedication
  7. Chapter One
  8. Chapter Two
  9. Chapter Three
  10. Chapter Four
  11. Chapter Five
  12. Chapter Six
  13. Chapter Seven
  14. Chapter Eight
  15. Chapter Nine
  16. Chapter Ten
  17. Chapter Eleven
  18. Chapter Twelve
  19. Chapter Thirteen
  20. Chapter Fourteen
  21. Chapter Fifteen
  22. Chapter Sixteen
  23. Chapter Seventeen
  24. Chapter Eighteen
  25. Chapter Nineteen
  26. Chapter Twenty
  27. Chapter Twenty-One
  28. Chapter Twenty-Two
  29. Chapter Twenty-Three
  30. Chapter Twenty-Four
  31. Chapter Twenty-Five
  32. Chapter Twenty-Six
  33. Chapter Twenty-Seven
  34. Chapter Twenty-Eight
  35. Chapter Twenty-Nine
  36. Acknowledgements
  37. Extract
  38. Saturday, 4 May 1996
  39. Chapter One
  40. Chapter Two
  41. Chapter Three
  42. About the Publisher

He looks back at Alice as she sets down the shots. Yvonne looks furious now. It’s hard to believe she’s the same person he used to find on their sofa on Sunday morning hung over and groaning after sitting in with Mum drinking all night. But then Dad always says life beats you around a bit. Maybe that’s what happened to her. Maybe there’s other stuff she’s gone through that’s changed her.

‘They’re not local girls, Dad, they’re English, well, one’s Irish or Scottish, something like that.’

‘Nice,’ Dad says. ‘Is Yvonne there?’

‘Yeah, course. But she’s in a bad mood.’

A roar goes up in the bar as the right team scores in the football game that plays on a TV in the corner.

‘Kiama, can’t you go somewhere quieter?’

Yvonne is standing up. Is she leaving? He hopes so. It would make sense for them to have a break from each other. The day has been intense. He wants to tell Dad about it, about seeing Purity and the orphanage and Jenga and Simeon and, what else, there’s been so much. He suddenly feels too tired to talk.

‘All I can hear is a wall of noise,’ Dad complains.

‘Sorry.’

‘Go someplace else.’

‘What?’ There’s no way Kiama can explain everything that’s happened so far, he wouldn’t know where to start.

Yvonne looks over at him and throws her hands up. Clearly she expects him to leave with her.

‘I’ve got to go,’ he says. ‘The reception is really bad.’

‘Hold up. Are you okay? What’s going on?’

‘I’m fine.’

‘You don’t sound fine.’

Dad always says how Kiama was born without the ability to hide his feelings.

‘K?’ he asks.

‘Look, I’m drunk, that’s all.’

There’s a pause on the other end, then Dad says, ‘Okay. Call me tomorrow. And be careful with those girls.’

‘Course.’

‘Love you.’

‘Love you too. Bye.’

He leans over the balcony and exhales deeply before walking back to the girls and Yvonne with her fed-up expression.

‘Are you seriously drunk on two beers?’ Delia laughs. ‘Such a lightweight.’

‘No, I’m not drunk on two beers,’ he lies.

‘So look, Purity’s not coming back tonight so we’ve decided to be rebels and stay out. But Yvonne’s going. I can imagine being out for the night with us lot isn’t her idea of fun?’

‘No. It’s not,’ Yvonne says.

Delia flashes a stretched smile and says, ‘Tell it like it is.’

He thought speaking to Dad would lift him but it’s made him feel worse, more confused, like he’s keeping secrets and he doesn’t know why.

‘I’m staying too,’ he says.

‘Yeah,’ Delia and Alice clap.

‘Really?’ Yvonne says, clearly pissed off.