“Oh. Yikes. No wonder she seems so uptight. And you weren’t exactly tight with Robbie either, right?”

“Understatement of the year,” I mutter. I look her square in the eyes, trying to decide exactly how much I can trust her, and nothing in the warm brown waiting there suggests anything other than that she’s patiently listening. “Robbie made life hell for Miguel. He was the only person at school other than me who knew Miguel was gay, and he used it to his advantage constantly—blackmailing Miguel to vote on his side anytime there was any sort of team conflict, treating him like an errand boy, demanding money all the time, and just generally being a dick. It’s true that Miguel and I are dating in part to keep other guys away from me, but the biggest reason was to discredit Robbie if he ever tried to out Migs. Except Robbie was such a fucking asshole that he took pictures as backup.”

Jack’s jaw drops so low, I can see a filling in one of her back molars. “That’s the guy people are so pissed I replaced? That’s the guy I’ve been trying to live up to? Are you fucking kidding me?”

“Trust me, it’s killing me and Miguel, but as far as I know, not a single soul at AHS knows about the blackmail other than the two of us and now you. And you absolutely cannot tell a soul.”

“You really wanna keep that a secret? Seeing how much everyone idolizes him? Seeing what hell I’m going through because of how much everyone idolizes him?” Fire flashes in her eyes and I worry I made a terrible mistake and shared too much. “They should know who they’re putting on a pedestal. Those guys are Santiago’s friends too—wouldn’t they be pissed on his behalf?”

I’m not sure which of us let go, but I’m suddenly very aware we’re no longer holding hands. “I’m pretty sure they’d be more focused on that he’s gay, Jack. He made a choice not to come out to them, and we’re not outing him on the chance it might make them let up on you. I’m really sorry they’re being shitty, but—”

“Amber.” Her voice is fierce enough to shut me up mid-sentence. “Of course I’m not talking about outing Miguel. Jesus fuck, who do you think I am?”

I don’t know, I think, because even though I want to, we’re still so new. This is still so new. And right now, I’m learning I can’t trust anything, and I don’t know whether or not that includes this thing between us.