“I didn’t realize you had aspirations of doing TV…” he said, trying and failing to keep a straight face.

“I know.” I punched his arm lightly. “It’s awful. Ophelia’s the worst and yet my life would be dull without her.”

He got serious. “Someone should be fielding this stuff for you and sifting through the garbage. Don’t you have an agent or manager yet?”

“Ugh, no. It just feels so Hollywood to be looking for an agent.”

“You can’t be too cool for Hollywood and dabble in Hollywood at the same time. You’re smarter than that. You either embrace this or you run the other way, but your attitude right now is going to backfire.”

“You’re right.” I sighed. Part of the reason I’d agreed to the deal was to gain exposure, but the more we achieved that, the more I simply felt exposed.

“Come to my meeting and talk to Chad. He comes across like a bro, but he’s smart and you won’t find a more vocal advocate. If he isn’t a good fit, he can help you find someone else.”

“Okay. That would be helpful. Thank you.”

I glanced up to see him pulling his suspenders up over his still perfectly pressed shirt. “I thought we talked about this last night. You can’t wear those.”

He grinned and dropped them off his shoulders, leaving them hanging around his pants, which really wasn’t much better. “I’m doing the walk of shame here, wearing what’s clearly last night’s tux to get home.”

“At least you don’t have to do it in heels and latex. Are you ashamed?” I asked. I was torn between wanting to check in but not wanting to make it weird.

“Not at all. I feel like you’re showing me a whole new side of myself. Are you ashamed?”

“This isn’t anything new for me. What would I have to be ashamed of?” He turned away, so I didn’t see his reaction.

Liar. I was a lying liar who lies. Lots of this was new. My cheek muscles hurt from smiling so much around him. And I did feel shame that I was pathetic enough to have feelings for him. So I was ashamed that I felt shame because I had rejected that feeling a long time ago. For someone with a master’s in psychology, I was having a hard time sorting through my shit.

I asked, “Should I just meet you there?”

“No, I can swing by and get you around two.”

“Sounds good. Now go work on your muscles.” I gave his biceps a squeeze and he pulled me in for a kiss that left me breathless, heart still racing when he closed the front door.

27

Alex

“How was your morning?” I asked once I’d picked Elena up to go meet with Chad. Luckily, I had to focus on the traffic, so I couldn’t stare at her. It had only been hours, and yet I’d missed her.