“I will show you fear in a handful of dust,” Ben said.

“If you’re going to quote T. S. Eliot, why not start at the beginning of the poem? It’s more impressive. ‘April is the cruelest month, breeding . . .’”

Ben punched me in the solar plexus. “Quote more poetry, asshole.”

“The police are going to find you,” I said as soon as I got enough breath back. “Why don’t you run while you can?”

“You ruined everything. I would’ve been a better father to Teddy than you ever could’ve been. Now, I don’t care what happens. Caroline’s dead. What does it matter?” He picked up a metal box. “But first, we have some business to take care of. I’m going to make you wish you’d never been born.”

He pushed the button again, pulling my shackled hands into the air a little higher, then dropping me suddenly. My arms rattled in their sockets. It felt as if they were about to be pulled from my torso.

“How does it feel to be completely powerless?” he asked.

“I’ve had worse days.”

“You’re the reason Caroline is dead. If she’d left you for me, she’d still be alive.” Ben looked me over. “She didn’t give a damn about you.”

“You can’t blame me for her death,” I said. “You’ll have to live with the guilt of that for the rest of your life.”

He pulled a black plastic object out of his pocket and took aim at me. As the hooks sank into my skin, I realized it was a Taser. The electricity that flooded through me was like a fire. It crackled through my brain, forcing my eyes wide and making me gasp.

“Admit it. Caroline never loved you. She was only with you for your money. Caroline was a climber. She used you as a stepping-stone,” he taunted.

I didn’t answer. He charged up the device again. The pain was overpowering, almost magnificent. Fire raged through my body again. I’d been here before, so many times, so many years ago. It was the oblivion I’d always craved. It was the reason I’d been with Mirelle and the reason I’d wasted endless nights in awful places and the reason I’d poured dangerous substances into my body. In the darkness was perfect stillness.

“Caroline stayed with you as long as she did because of Teddy. But she hated you, Theo. She really did. Caroline knew you murdered a girl years ago. She thought you deserved the worst.”