His gaze pinned mine. “Ask me to relinquish it. Tell me what you want.”

“Would you truly give up your position?” My voice rang with disbelief.

He did not flinch. “Is that what it will take for you to give me another chance?”

“More word games, Wenzhi? Must you always play to win?”

“You play the same way.”

“You are wrong,” I told him. “There are some games I will not play. Sometimes those who think they have won are the greatest losers.”

“I just want to understand the stakes,” he countered.

“It’s finished. We both lost.”

He regarded me in silence for a moment. “I did not think you would run. I never took you for a coward.”

The silken bite in his tone stung. It was what he wanted, to goad me into retaliation, into saying something I should not, but I reined in my emotions. “I am not a coward, just not a fool.”

He sighed. “I don’t want to fight with you, Xingyin. I wronged you. I wish to make amends if you will let me. If there is anything you desire, you have but to ask.”

He was so proud, I never thought to hear such an admission from him. Even knowing all I did, my pulse quickened, a familiar ache rising within. If only I could erase the foolish, sentimental part of me that still cared, that should have died the moment I learned his true nature.

But could we truly hate those we had loved before? I was learning that such a transformation was not as seamless as I had hoped. Wenzhi was right; I had wanted to hurt him, to chase him from my home, to cut him from my life … yet I did not really want his death. Not then, and not now. However, forgiveness was a different matter. I was still furious; I could never trust him again. Any tenderness I had felt, any hope for a future was irrevocably destroyed. Yet I could not deny that his offer tempted me, for I was not one to toss away an opportunity. If danger lay ahead, I would do all I could to arm myself against it.

I walked to the balustrade and rested my elbows against the cool stone, staring at the luminous earth that stretched beneath us like the starlit sea. “I am only speaking to you now because you let Liwei and me go, because your plan failed. If you had truly cost me my freedom and that of my mother, I would shoot you now without hesitation.”

“Would you really?” His voice lifted with challenge.

Anger seared me as I spun to leave, but he moved in front of me.

“Wait. I’m sorry.” He stretched his arms wide. “You may aim at your leisure.”